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Thread: She is too short tempered!

  1. #1
    New Born A.mtr's Avatar
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    Default She is too short tempered!

    Hi,
    I have a very complicated problem and i really don't know what to do. I have a girlfriend, we both love each other so much it has been around one and half year we have been in relationship, when newly being related to each other she wasn't that serious as i was and besides having me as a lover, she had been committed to her past, she was kinda flirt and since time changes a person, she changed and knowing of her past, we had lots of argument and i forgave her cause what she did was really hurting. I forgave her and forgot her past, today i look at her as the person she is today. She is very short tempered, she gets angry so soon, getting disturbed by little things but i always manage and try to convince her. I do anything that makes her happy, we are really far from each other, i am living in Asia and she is in Europe, firstly i trusted her like kinda with closed eyes but after knowing of her past and things she did even when we were in relationship made me lose my belief. Today i am feeling like i am trusting her but always there is kinda doubt in my mind. I don't know maybe i am have still not got over her past and her behavior. I love her so much but there are lots of problems, we have age difference as she is 3 years older but we both love each other too much and i don't know how hard would it be to convince my family. I am not like others boys, i am different, my thoughts are different and the way i do everything is different. My aims have always been high and i try for my aims too, sometimes i get a little lazy. Now i have started to think for higher degrees, i want to top board exams for joining higher studies, it is not something that i can't do, i really have the potential and i am like a gifted person, i am not praising myself but am trying to tell my nature and my gf, though i she is more than a girlfriend for me she is my everything, my gf she is different from me, she is kinda short tempered, she is not too intelligent. I don't really care for that cause i may make her understand it but now, i don't know whether i will be able to have her in my future or not. I have a friend, she is so dear to me, she is like my sister and i respect her but my girlfriend is like being jealous of her, she thinks like we both love each other, my friend just teased her once and made her angry and after that she has lots of hatred in her heart for her but all is that she is my very good friend and my gf knows what even 1000 girls cannot take her place in my heart as i have loved her with my mind and soul. I really don't know what to do, she does not understand me. Last night i told her to reply my friend's message cause it is not good to be proud and not answer anyone's messages or being rude. I really told her everything in a very easy way but at last she told me that don't make me sick. I only wanted her to be easy telling her that this is not only the issue of my friend, i never want you to be bad to anyone but since she is short tempered she told me not to make her sick and i just left without talking to her.
    Now my question is that i have started to think that i can't pass my life with a girl like her, who cannot understand me. I have only and only love her and it is not that i have anything for anyone else or my friend
    i have only loved her but i can't take my decision, i want to be someone like i mentioned my aims, topping nationally in whole country is not something easy i have to work hard, i don't know what to do as i think if i leave her i can study better but whenever i try to do something that would make her hate me and i can easy get away from her without hurting her i feel like i cannot break her heart. I don't know what to do
    should i leave her? if i leave her than how, so that she feels less pain
    if i continue with her then how to make her understand coz if i tell her alot then she says u treat me as a child
    Help me please
    Last edited by A.mtr; 10-04-2009 at 07:43 PM.

  2. #2
    SB Wizard Captain Zia1507's Avatar
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    Well dear.. Here i can understand these things of misunderstandings.. And sometime when someone mistrust you it become really difficult to convince her that you love only her or she's the most important one for you.. And you know the matter concerning your friend.. the mistake you did was imposing things on her(like be good to my friend etc) which was showing her that your friend is more important.. As a girlfriend she will feel jealous, and by behaving like this you'll get tendency to complicate things more... And she is possessif and will end up by making breaking your friendship with your friend.. She wont understand that's for sure...

    But let this go.. The matter is that you want to move ahead, and i think if you believe that you'll study better without her then do it.. Because you will be tired handling her and her misunderstandings in the future.. Later will affect your studies.. Well get distance slowly.. Communicate less, with excuses that you have lots to revise and all..

  3. #3
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Ya, Zia has sound advise to give you actually. I will just add to that that you are still to give your Board exams, you have great aims and ambitions and getting into such a serious love relationship at this point is not at all a good idea.

    Be friends, spend reasonable amount of time with each other but do get your priorities right, will you?

    If you will tell her that you need a little time to study, and then go ahead and MAKE that time for yourself, that will be best for you as well as your relationship. Its way too early to start worrying about who your life partner will be. If it is destined to be this girl, well, then things will work themselves out! but right now there are many, many years before that will happen, so don't waste precious time.

    You concentrate on your work. That's you primary duty and responsibility. Be friends with this girl, but do try and not get so emotionally involved, will you?

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    yes get careful

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    New Born A.mtr's Avatar
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    Thanks for the advice, i have tried many times to just get away but i can't see her being sad, i can see anything, can tolerate anything but when it comes to this girl i am quite helpless. Whatever i do, if i tell her harsh things or give logical reasons, she is just not letting me go. I had tried many times, and even i fought her, told her very very harsh words but she says that whatever happens she will not let me go as i am her everything.
    Will it be a sin if i break her heart? I know for her it is very difficult to live without me but i have to...

  6. #6
    ×║♥ਸੋਹਣੀ ਮੋਟੀ♥║× Lieutenant General
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    give air to your text dear

    i find it hard to read, it's like you are talking woithout breathing

    please take care of it next time dear

    well i'll just reply to your last post

    no it's not a sin to break up with someone, you said you've tried hard letting her know about this side of her

    i myself, i am short tempered and when i do this, it's to get attention, i guess this might be the case for her, this does not necessarily means that she does not love you

    but if you wish to go dear, if you can't bear it then resort to break up because i can empathize with you on this subject , after this she will realize that what she did was wrong and as you know we ignore about the importance of someone in our life untill he/she go

    so try it and good luck

    first go for a last attempt into talking to her about the issue if she want to hear no words of it , then you know what to do ...


  7. #7
    SB Wizard Captain Zia1507's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by A.mtr View Post
    Thanks for the advice, i have tried many times to just get away but i can't see her being sad, i can see anything, can tolerate anything but when it comes to this girl i am quite helpless. Whatever i do, if i tell her harsh things or give logical reasons, she is just not letting me go. I had tried many times, and even i fought her, told her very very harsh words but she says that whatever happens she will not let me go as i am her everything.
    Will it be a sin if i break her heart? I know for her it is very difficult to live without me but i have to...
    Means you are in a better position.. Look she loves you a lot thats why she misunderstand you because she want you to be only for her.. So if now she start with the issue of mistrust: you and your friend what you can do to deal with this is that you tell her: "Look i know i am honest to you.. I do love you a lot and i know that no one will ever take your place but now if you dont believe me i cant do anything about this.. I cant change your way of thinking and am simply tired!! I didnt expect that you will be someone who will doubt me and it has hurt me now to know that you dont trust me to that extent" Do show her that somewhere you are angry and hurt..

    If she just try to trap you again with sentimental words just tell her i've told you think what you want i wont tell anything more.. And leave her for some days!! You'll see everything will turn on her.. She will realise if she continue in this way she'll lose you then she will force herself to understand!!

    Well i used to be a bit like your gf always doubts and keep reacting.. And when my bf turned everything on me i realised... I told you all what my bf told me.. He just played with words with me and i had no choice when started avoid me... Its from my experiance.. Try it it may work out to help you to make your gf stop doubting you..

  8. #8
    New Born A.mtr's Avatar
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    Thanks, Well i talked to her
    Like i told she is short tempered she says something now and later she apologizes, she got fine and me too. Whatever happens this girl loves me more than anyone. My friend told her that she would never talk to anyone of us again. My friend thinks that when she talks to me, my girlfriend gets jealous so she told my her that she would walk away from our life and she won't be there anymore being the reason of fight and arguing between us.
    Her words effected my girlfriend much more and last night she was talking and laughing to my friend and also apologizing me and asking to talk to my friend. She said that losing your friend has made you sad and i can't bear it.
    She turned into good person last night. Well it happens when someone is short tempered.
    Now can i issue my another question, i am sure you guys will help me out.
    I am getting a bit lazy and this laziness makes me think that i can do better everything alone while i realized that i can study having her and without her, i cannot concentrate.
    Help me gain more concentration as i have the brains but not the hard work, help me gain my hard work.
    I am really really thankful to each and everyone of you for your support, THANK YOU VERY MUCH

  9. #9
    New Born A.mtr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ♥»вlυεвεггγ«♥ View Post
    give air to your text dear

    i find it hard to read, it's like you are talking woithout breathing

    please take care of it next time dear

    well i'll just reply to your last post

    no it's not a sin to break up with someone, you said you've tried hard letting her know about this side of her

    i myself, i am short tempered and when i do this, it's to get attention, i guess this might be the case for her, this does not necessarily means that she does not love you

    but if you wish to go dear, if you can't bear it then resort to break up because i can empathize with you on this subject , after this she will realize that what she did was wrong and as you know we ignore about the importance of someone in our life untill he/she go

    so try it and good luck

    first go for a last attempt into talking to her about the issue if she want to hear no words of it , then you know what to do ...

    Ahha, Thank you.

    It was that my heart was full of pain and all i did was give comma and start sentences again and again.

    Thank you for the suggestion as it helped me realize my options.

    I am not as decorative as you but still hope i write better this time


    Good Day

  10. #10
    ×║♥ਸੋਹਣੀ ਮੋਟੀ♥║× Lieutenant General
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    Quote Originally Posted by A.mtr View Post
    Ahha, Thank you.

    It was that my heart was full of pain and all i did was give comma and start sentences again and again.

    Thank you for the suggestion as it helped me realize my options.

    I am not as decorative as you but still hope i write better this time


    Good Day
    no not to be decorative, just give space between some sentences lol

    anyway hope u feeling better


  11. #11
    New Born A.mtr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ♥»вlυεвεггγ«♥ View Post
    no not to be decorative, just give space between some sentences lol

    anyway hope u feeling better
    Well Ur name, signature, everything does seem to be
    Not To mention
    Thanks anyways

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by A.mtr View Post
    Hi,
    I have a very complicated problem and i really don't know what to do. I have a girlfriend, we both love each other so much it has been around one and half year we have been in relationship, when newly being related to each other she wasn't that serious as i was and besides having me as a lover, she had been committed to her past, she was kinda flirt and since time changes a person, she changed and knowing of her past, we had lots of argument and i forgave her cause what she did was really hurting. I forgave her and forgot her past, today i look at her as the person she is today. She is very short tempered, she gets angry so soon, getting disturbed by little things but i always manage and try to convince her. I do anything that makes her happy, we are really far from each other, i am living in Asia and she is in Europe, firstly i trusted her like kinda with closed eyes but after knowing of her past and things she did even when we were in relationship made me lose my belief. Today i am feeling like i am trusting her but always there is kinda doubt in my mind. I don't know maybe i am have still not got over her past and her behavior. I love her so much but there are lots of problems, we have age difference as she is 3 years older but we both love each other too much and i don't know how hard would it be to convince my family. I am not like others boys, i am different, my thoughts are different and the way i do everything is different. My aims have always been high and i try for my aims too, sometimes i get a little lazy. Now i have started to think for higher degrees, i want to top board exams for joining higher studies, it is not something that i can't do, i really have the potential and i am like a gifted person, i am not praising myself but am trying to tell my nature and my gf, though i she is more than a girlfriend for me she is my everything, my gf she is different from me, she is kinda short tempered, she is not too intelligent. I don't really care for that cause i may make her understand it but now, i don't know whether i will be able to have her in my future or not. I have a friend, she is so dear to me, she is like my sister and i respect her but my girlfriend is like being jealous of her, she thinks like we both love each other, my friend just teased her once and made her angry and after that she has lots of hatred in her heart for her but all is that she is my very good friend and my gf knows what even 1000 girls cannot take her place in my heart as i have loved her with my mind and soul. I really don't know what to do, she does not understand me. Last night i told her to reply my friend's message cause it is not good to be proud and not answer anyone's messages or being rude. I really told her everything in a very easy way but at last she told me that don't make me sick. I only wanted her to be easy telling her that this is not only the issue of my friend, i never want you to be bad to anyone but since she is short tempered she told me not to make her sick and i just left without talking to her.
    Now my question is that i have started to think that i can't pass my life with a girl like her, who cannot understand me. I have only and only love her and it is not that i have anything for anyone else or my friend
    i have only loved her but i can't take my decision, i want to be someone like i mentioned my aims, topping nationally in whole country is not something easy i have to work hard, i don't know what to do as i think if i leave her i can study better but whenever i try to do something that would make her hate me and i can easy get away from her without hurting her i feel like i cannot break her heart. I don't know what to do
    should i leave her? if i leave her than how, so that she feels less pain
    if i continue with her then how to make her understand coz if i tell her alot then she says u treat me as a child
    Help me please



    dude..i think so..she's playing a game...

    or you say..you r the game she'z playing

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