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Thread: Dealing with horny boyfriend

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    Default Dealing with horny boyfriend

    hi Mam my boyfriend is horny most of the time. He talks sexy stuff a lot. But I am confused what to say back. I don't know what to reply.

    Can u please help me?
    Last edited by Preeto Maam; 24-04-2009 at 12:26 PM.

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    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    This is a wonderful question as many teens find themselves in the same situation you are in, where the bf is pressurising them to have sex. So here are some possible ways you can respond, depending on what your thoughts and feelings are about this issue:



    ďIím not planning on having sex until Iím [married, engaged, at least 18, in a relationship for at least a year, etc. Ė whatever is right for you]. So if you keep asking, just know that Iím going to keep saying Ďno.íĒ

    ďTo tell you the truth, I donít know when Iíll be ready. But what I do know is that Iím not ready right now. So donít keep asking me about sex Ė letís just leave it that Iíll let you know when Iím ready to start talking about it and thinking about it.Ē

    ďIíve already told you that Iím not ready for sex, and you keep bugging me about it anyways. It makes me feel like you donít respect and care about my feelings. So if you keep bringing this up even though Iíve said Ďno,í itís going to start to be a real problem in our relationship.Ē

    ďI get that youíre horny, but just because Iím dating you Iím under no obligation to take care of that for you. The fact is, Iím just not ready to be sexually active, so we need to talk about how to deal with this problem so I donít feel pressured to do something I donít want to, and so it doesnít start affecting our relationship in a bad way.Ē

    ďJust because Iím saying Ďnoí to sex doesnít mean I donít love you or care about you. I do care, and I show that to you in lots of ways Ė itís just that right now sex isnít going to be one of those ways. And thatís because I also love and respect myself Ė so I donít want to put myself in a position to do something that Iím just not ready and comfortable to do.Ē

    ďYou can threaten to break up with me if I donít have sex with you. But all that does is make me want to be with you even less if you are going to use threats to get what you want and if you are going to make sex more important than me and my feelings.Ē

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    he is not your lover hez thokoo

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    Hi Mila,

    Your problem is not that serious when compared to others. if he is just talking and gets pleasure out of it, just leave it. But if you feel very embarrased and cant take it beyond a particular level, then you have to tell him point blank to change the topic.

    If he is asking you to have sex, its a clear No No unless you also want it.

    Sanjay


    Quote Originally Posted by mailtomila View Post
    hi Mam my boyfriend is horny most of the time. He talks sexy stuff a lot. But I am confused what to say back. I don't know what to reply.

    Can u please help me?

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    tell him straight that U don`t like this

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    Maam reply is awsome.....

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    whats meant by horny all the time? he talks about sex only or force you for sex also? dont agree for forced stuff
    i think he is sex addict. you dont have to put u in danger

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    Quote Originally Posted by mailtomila View Post
    hi Mam my boyfriend is horny most of the time. He talks sexy stuff a lot. But I am confused what to say back. I don't know what to reply.

    Can u please help me?
    dear....if he talk dirty stuff...u dont have to do same if u dont want... ur ignorance shows u r a gud girl...be with gud guys....

    reverseidea@yahoo.co.in

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    SB Champion Lieutenant vsingh165's Avatar
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    He's obviously being a creep. Break up with him and tell all your friends how much of an idiot he is. That way he will learn the lesson the hard way and not ever forget it!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Preeto Maam View Post
    This is a wonderful question as many teens find themselves in the same situation you are in, where the bf is pressurising them to have sex. So here are some possible ways you can respond, depending on what your thoughts and feelings are about this issue:



    “I’m not planning on having sex until I’m [married, engaged, at least 18, in a relationship for at least a year, etc. – whatever is right for you]. So if you keep asking, just know that I’m going to keep saying ‘no.’”

    “To tell you the truth, I don’t know when I’ll be ready. But what I do know is that I’m not ready right now. So don’t keep asking me about sex – let’s just leave it that I’ll let you know when I’m ready to start talking about it and thinking about it.”

    “I’ve already told you that I’m not ready for sex, and you keep bugging me about it anyways. It makes me feel like you don’t respect and care about my feelings. So if you keep bringing this up even though I’ve said ‘no,’ it’s going to start to be a real problem in our relationship.”

    “I get that you’re horny, but just because I’m dating you I’m under no obligation to take care of that for you. The fact is, I’m just not ready to be sexually active, so we need to talk about how to deal with this problem so I don’t feel pressured to do something I don’t want to, and so it doesn’t start affecting our relationship in a bad way.”

    “Just because I’m saying ‘no’ to sex doesn’t mean I don’t love you or care about you. I do care, and I show that to you in lots of ways – it’s just that right now sex isn’t going to be one of those ways. And that’s because I also love and respect myself – so I don’t want to put myself in a position to do something that I’m just not ready and comfortable to do.”

    “You can threaten to break up with me if I don’t have sex with you. But all that does is make me want to be with you even less if you are going to use threats to get what you want and if you are going to make sex more important than me and my feelings.”
    The best answers possibly can be given!!!!!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Preeto Maam View Post
    This is a wonderful question as many teens find themselves in the same situation you are in, where the bf is pressurising them to have sex. So here are some possible ways you can respond, depending on what your thoughts and feelings are about this issue:



    ďIím not planning on having sex until Iím [married, engaged, at least 18, in a relationship for at least a year, etc. Ė whatever is right for you]. So if you keep asking, just know that Iím going to keep saying Ďno.íĒ

    ďTo tell you the truth, I donít know when Iíll be ready. But what I do know is that Iím not ready right now. So donít keep asking me about sex Ė letís just leave it that Iíll let you know when Iím ready to start talking about it and thinking about it.Ē

    ďIíve already told you that Iím not ready for sex, and you keep bugging me about it anyways. It makes me feel like you donít respect and care about my feelings. So if you keep bringing this up even though Iíve said Ďno,í itís going to start to be a real problem in our relationship.Ē

    ďI get that youíre horny, but just because Iím dating you Iím under no obligation to take care of that for you. The fact is, Iím just not ready to be sexually active, so we need to talk about how to deal with this problem so I donít feel pressured to do something I donít want to, and so it doesnít start affecting our relationship in a bad way.Ē

    ďJust because Iím saying Ďnoí to sex doesnít mean I donít love you or care about you. I do care, and I show that to you in lots of ways Ė itís just that right now sex isnít going to be one of those ways. And thatís because I also love and respect myself Ė so I donít want to put myself in a position to do something that Iím just not ready and comfortable to do.Ē

    ďYou can threaten to break up with me if I donít have sex with you. But all that does is make me want to be with you even less if you are going to use threats to get what you want and if you are going to make sex more important than me and my feelings.Ē
    Young lady Preetomaam, her problem is that he just talks and not ask for sex, which most teenagers tend to do with their gf... I mean bit naughty stuff which I feel is not considered offensive or taboo nowadays.. She can plainly say that she is not comfortable discussing sex like this, and talk on some other topic while her bf is discussing sex, this wud be called avoiding indirectly and her friend wud get a hint..

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    Quote Originally Posted by mailtomila View Post
    hi Mam my boyfriend is horny most of the time. He talks sexy stuff a lot. But I am confused what to say back. I don't know what to reply.

    Can u please help me?
    Tell him some bad words in punjabi. that will kill mood in no time. at least 4 me.

    jokes aside, tell him wht u really feel. honest is betta then get caught in emotional turmoil.

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    he is trying to initiate sex. and i think you dont want it. go by the methods provided by preeto maam. those are the best ways to express it without hurting him. goodluck.

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    Default love for sale..........!!!!!!

    hey mali agar dear its harsh reality k wo tumhara true lover nai hy.....bcoz jin k liay dil main sincere feelings hon us ky liay dil main koi sexual feeling nai aati....sexual feelings aur jesa tum ny kaha ky openly sexi baatain to bilkul bi nai krta koi agr feelings true hon to....wo sirf flirt kr ra hy....agr tum jaal main phans gaeen to theek nai to kahin aur ja k kaanta daal ky baith jaey ga...
    anyways agr tum sex pasand nai krteen to best reply to MA'AM ny likh diay hain...then see whow he reacts...

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    Default sexy talks

    Quote Originally Posted by Preeto Maam View Post
    This is a wonderful question as many teens find themselves in the same situation you are in, where the bf is pressurising them to have sex. So here are some possible ways you can respond, depending on what your thoughts and feelings are about this issue:



    ďIím not planning on having sex until Iím [married, engaged, at least 18, in a relationship for at least a year, etc. Ė whatever is right for you]. So if you keep asking, just know that Iím going to keep saying Ďno.íĒ

    ďTo tell you the truth, I donít know when Iíll be ready. But what I do know is that Iím not ready right now. So donít keep asking me about sex Ė letís just leave it that Iíll let you know when Iím ready to start talking about it and thinking about it.Ē

    ďIíve already told you that Iím not ready for sex, and you keep bugging me about it anyways. It makes me feel like you donít respect and care about my feelings. So if you keep bringing this up even though Iíve said Ďno,í itís going to start to be a real problem in our relationship.Ē

    ďI get that youíre horny, but just because Iím dating you Iím under no obligation to take care of that for you. The fact is, Iím just not ready to be sexually active, so we need to talk about how to deal with this problem so I donít feel pressured to do something I donít want to, and so it doesnít start affecting our relationship in a bad way.Ē

    ďJust because Iím saying Ďnoí to sex doesnít mean I donít love you or care about you. I do care, and I show that to you in lots of ways Ė itís just that right now sex isnít going to be one of those ways. And thatís because I also love and respect myself Ė so I donít want to put myself in a position to do something that Iím just not ready and comfortable to do.Ē

    ďYou can threaten to break up with me if I donít have sex with you. But all that does is make me want to be with you even less if you are going to use threats to get what you want and if you are going to make sex more important than me and my feelings.Ē




    Preetomam is the Best! Always gives good advice - Mali listen to what mam says. All the best.

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