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Thread: Serious relationship in a real mess

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    Default Serious relationship in a real mess

    I am 20 yrs old. I was in a serious relationship with a girl my age for almost 3 yrs. She always said she loves me a lot and she would never leave me. About 3 months back due to some misunderstanding i told her not to contact me for 1 month and she accepted what i said. After 1 month she said she asked me to break up with her. I was shocked and accepted it without knowing what i was doing. She got into another relationship with a good friend of hers who is her junior and who also used to flirt with her a lot.
    I cannot forget her, we have met a few times in the past couple of weeks and on my insistence she says she would break up with him (to give our relationship another chance) after a month or so when he comes back from another city.

    Why is she doing all this? What should i do now? I am in real mess. I am devastated to the core. Please help

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Well, she is probably doing it to get her self esteem back and to prove to herself and the world that she is desirable to someone even if its not you.

    Break ups have strange effects on people. We don't realize that when we do break up instead of trying to make things work. Well, now you just have to wait and watch and hope that she returns to you. It may be difficult for her because she may have invested some emotions in her new relationship but you have a long shared history, so that may work in your favour. I counsel a lot of patience and a lot of perseverance!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I am 20 yrs old. I was in a serious relationship with a girl my age for almost 3 yrs. She always said she loves me a lot and she would never leave me. About 3 months back due to some misunderstanding i told her not to contact me for 1 month and she accepted what i said. After 1 month she said she asked me to break up with her. I was shocked and accepted it without knowing what i was doing. She got into another relationship with a good friend of hers who is her junior and who also used to flirt with her a lot.
    I cannot forget her, we have met a few times in the past couple of weeks and on my insistence she says she would break up with him (to give our relationship another chance) after a month or so when he comes back from another city.

    Why is she doing all this? What should i do now? I am in real mess. I am devastated to the core. Please help
    now this mess has been created by ur own self... what made u behave like a kid and give her a punishment of not calling for a month..... in that period u urself didnt contact her..... what sense does that make...... even if there was a problem u shud have sorted it out... not calling each other for a month is kiddish......

    now she was too early to move on with the new relation...infact urs relation wasnt even called off it was just a punsihment.... it just shows at this age u ppl are not mature enuf, this is not love u ppl are into relations becuase at this age u have too.....

    she must be doing all this for ur happiness as she has been with u for so long,

    all this mess must happened becuase of misunderstanding wen u were away from her she must have taken this situation in wrong way that u might have left her or forgotten her so she must have moved on though too early....

    and even u accpeted to leave her without knowing anything, so it must have been a big misunderstading. where she must have tot u left her.....

    but since ur insisting her to be back she wants to give this relation and u a chance......

    but moving like a pendulum in relations doesnt make sense.....

    u decide what u want from this relation... and dont be kiddish if u are going on with it

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    she`s bored with you that`s Y

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    thank u preeto maam. the "self esteem" thing was said by her. U r a demi god maam. Thanks a lot. But also does she accepting my request to give us more time mean that she might be willing to come back at me.

    @ enjoy

    i know man i was kiddish n i am also really sorry for it now. I have even cried in front of her but she seems quite adamant.

    I dont know what to do still. its tking a toll on me..

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    Healer!! Major FeeDback's Avatar
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    @Richil

    A depressed boy asked S. Vivekanand, " Can there b anything worse than losing a girlfriend ?"
    He replied Yes, losing your confidence of getting another .

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    Quote Originally Posted by FeeDback View Post
    @Richil

    A depressed boy asked S. Vivekanand, " Can there b anything worse than losing a girlfriend ?"
    He replied Yes, losing your confidence of getting another .


    Good Reply :IAGREE:

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    ..Yaar Patialavi.. Colonel a_decent_1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I am 20 yrs old. I was in a serious relationship with a girl my age for almost 3 yrs. She always said she loves me a lot and she would never leave me. About 3 months back due to some misunderstanding i told her not to contact me for 1 month and she accepted what i said. After 1 month she said she asked me to break up with her. I was shocked and accepted it without knowing what i was doing. She got into another relationship with a good friend of hers who is her junior and who also used to flirt with her a lot.
    I cannot forget her, we have met a few times in the past couple of weeks and on my insistence she says she would break up with him (to give our relationship another chance) after a month or so when he comes back from another city.

    Why is she doing all this? What should i do now? I am in real mess. I am devastated to the core. Please help
    Who are you..?

    Who are you to tell her "Don't contact me for 1 month" ...? When you get an Answer to that, you'll understand that this Girl also has the equal right to say "Get Lost, I got a new one" .. !!

    She won't take it if you wanna be the BOSS.. !! Remember one thing dear buddy, We men are REAL STRONG when it comes to Muscles, but Women are Twice as strong when it comes to Emotions.. !! They might act "emotional fools" when they are in Love, But "ONCE A GIRL DECIDES IT IS TIME TO GET OVER YOU, YOU CANNOT DO ANYTHING TO REVERSE HER DECISION" .. !!


    Now, Coming back to your Problem.. !! I don't see your Relationship as a Strong Bond. It obviously wont last for long.. Everytime you Fight, You'll tell her how she Betrayed you for another guy.. !!

    It's BEST to leave her alone.. It's tough but that's the Best solution.

    G'dy

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    Quote Originally Posted by a_decent_1 View Post
    Who are you..?

    Who are you to tell her "Don't contact me for 1 month" ...? When you get an Answer to that, you'll understand that this Girl also has the equal right to say "Get Lost, I got a new one" .. !!

    She won't take it if you wanna be the BOSS.. !! Remember one thing dear buddy, We men are REAL STRONG when it comes to Muscles, but Women are Twice as strong when it comes to Emotions.. !! They might act "emotional fools" when they are in Love, But "ONCE A GIRL DECIDES IT IS TIME TO GET OVER YOU, YOU CANNOT DO ANYTHING TO REVERSE HER DECISION" .. !!


    Now, Coming back to your Problem.. !! I don't see your Relationship as a Strong Bond. It obviously wont last for long.. Everytime you Fight, You'll tell her how she Betrayed you for another guy.. !!

    It's BEST to leave her alone.. It's tough but that's the Best solution.

    G'dy
    Fabulous reply...
    Reps+

    @thread starter
    Bhai jaan tum usey yeh kehne waale hote kaun ho...
    Jiyo aur usey bhi jeene do!!
    Dont try being a boss when u can manage...
    Usne tumse pyaar kiya iska matlab ye nahi hai ki tuney usey khareed liya!!

    I really appreciate dat gal...

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    SB MahaGuru Colonel mesosweet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by a_decent_1 View Post
    Who are you..?

    Who are you to tell her "Don't contact me for 1 month" ...? When you get an Answer to that, you'll understand that this Girl also has the equal right to say "Get Lost, I got a new one" .. !!

    She won't take it if you wanna be the BOSS.. !! Remember one thing dear buddy, We men are REAL STRONG when it comes to Muscles, but Women are Twice as strong when it comes to Emotions.. !! They might act "emotional fools" when they are in Love, But "ONCE A GIRL DECIDES IT IS TIME TO GET OVER YOU, YOU CANNOT DO ANYTHING TO REVERSE HER DECISION" .. !!


    Now, Coming back to your Problem.. !! I don't see your Relationship as a Strong Bond. It obviously wont last for long.. Everytime you Fight, You'll tell her how she Betrayed you for another guy.. !!

    It's BEST to leave her alone.. It's tough but that's the Best solution.

    G'dy


    seconded...

    i mean cz of a misunderstanding u told her not to talk 4 0ne month....who gave u the authority to dictate terms on ur grl frnd.

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    But i never avoided her or anything. i contacted her after a few days but she dint reply or anything..

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    ..Yaar Patialavi.. Colonel a_decent_1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by richil View Post
    But i never avoided her or anything. i contacted her after a few days but she dint reply or anything..
    Mate,

    Why would she...? You cannoy make her feel like Garbage.. !! She cannot allow you to throw her anytime you want and then come searching a few days later.. !!

    If you "REALLY" want her back and are ready to accept her then all you need to do is "Build Faith" .. !! Show her your Love.. !! Don't cry, just be there with her.. !! "NEVER SCOLD HER" .. !! Smile on her mistakes.. !! Forgive when she is wrong.. !!

    If you can do the above mentioned things, I "assure" you that the girl would be yours.. !! But "TRUST ME" , only 1 out of a Million guys can Love a girl to the extent where he can Forgive her mistakes and not take it to his Ego.

    G'day

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    Default Let it free

    feel like writing what I read years back-
    "If you love some one set her/him free, If she/he comes back, she/he was yours, if not then she/he was never yours."
    Apart from that, you need to talk to her properly with due respect and dignity. Crying will not help. If she is into relationship and dsnt want to come back to you even if u are saying sorry, let her go. Its life, sometimes one learns in life in hardway.... there are things, you just can't control or get back.
    Godbless.

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    Quote Originally Posted by FeeDback View Post
    @Richil

    A depressed boy asked S. Vivekanand, " Can there b anything worse than losing a girlfriend ?"
    He replied Yes, losing your confidence of getting another .
    did swami vivekananda REALLY say that?!!! (he was seriously cooler than i thought!)

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    Healer!! Major FeeDback's Avatar
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    really don't know , i read it somewhere. .

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