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Thread: Wife is questioning my faith in her

  1. #1
    unregistered problem
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    Default Wife is questioning my faith in her

    Hiya Mam....


    I am abhyut. I am/was currently doing job in India and I got promoted in my very first year at job to newyork. I recently got married and my wife is completely ideal for me....


    After hearing about my transfer she started acting insane.....totally insane... she started fighting with me on small and non-sense topics...

    I tried to find out reason for her behaviour her after immense research her best friend told me that one of their friend's husband cheated on her and married to a girl in US...

    I am totally faithful to my wife and I love her by my life.... I am too much depressed by this behaviour of her...

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    Moderator Major General galaxy_resident's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by unregistered problem View Post
    Hiya Mam....


    I am abhyut. I am/was currently doing job in India and I got promoted in my very first year at job to newyork. I recently got married and my wife is completely ideal for me....


    After hearing about my transfer she started acting insane.....totally insane... she started fighting with me on small and non-sense topics...

    I tried to find out reason for her behaviour her after immense research her best friend told me that one of their friend's husband cheated on her and married to a girl in US...

    I am totally faithful to my wife and I love her by my life.... I am too much depressed by this behaviour of her...
    Firstly, your wife is being silly here. You are getting the chance of your life and she's ruining it all. If your wife is so much agitated by this, take her along with you to the US. Try to convince her that all men are not like that and your love for is genuine and true and you will be her's forever. Take the help of some elders in your family and mutual friends to talk to her and convince her.

    It may be also that she may be fearing that she will have to part from her mom, dad and friends to a different continent. Don't worry about that, she will get used to it and will adjust herself according to it. Moreover, she can remain in contact with them through internet, video calls etc.
    The problem with internet quotes is that you can't trust their authenticity.
    - Abraham Lincoln


  3. #3
    ..Yaar Patialavi.. Colonel a_decent_1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by unregistered problem View Post
    Hiya Mam....


    I am abhyut. I am/was currently doing job in India and I got promoted in my very first year at job to newyork. I recently got married and my wife is completely ideal for me....


    After hearing about my transfer she started acting insane.....totally insane... she started fighting with me on small and non-sense topics...

    I tried to find out reason for her behaviour her after immense research her best friend told me that one of their friend's husband cheated on her and married to a girl in US...

    I am totally faithful to my wife and I love her by my life.... I am too much depressed by this behaviour of her...
    Dear,

    (1) I do not believe your Wife is "Insane" just because you say she is. !!

    (2) What Fights are you talking about..? Is there a Pattern..? What initiates the Fight..?

    (3) Her "Best Friend" told you something and that's what you're basing your Opinion on..? Wow, You're a MAN.. !!

    If she is "Uneasy" relocating to a Different place, it is understandable. She does not "Ought" to do something just because she is married to you. If she is uncomfortable, she has the right to be.. !!

    Consider what she says and decide what is best for BOTH of you and just you.. !!
    Regards.
    My Personality depends on who I am.My Attitude depends on who you are.
    a_decent_1™ ©®

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    Default Consider these options

    A trust deficit between a newly married couple can have serious long term consequences and make your everyday life miserable. If you need to reinforce this trust, you need to take some initiative from your side.
    Consider these options

    1. Tattoo her initials on your back-side.
    2. Get a chastity belt and leave all the keys with her. Tell her that you will have it on at all times. However, do get an exemtion letter from the Emmigration authorities to go through airport metal detectors.
    3. Take your mother-in-law with you to New York.
    4. Quit your job and harass her for dowry.
    5. Enrol into spiritual classes that help you abstain from all forms of pleasure.
    6. Get drunk everyday. (It helps deal with the pressure and ensures no performance)
    7. Introduce her to your best looking friend and tell her that he will take your place and do all necessary till you come back. Like a deposit / replacement.

    Enjoy the big apple

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    ..Yaar Patialavi.. Colonel a_decent_1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Logical_Guru View Post
    A trust deficit between a newly married couple can have serious long term consequences and make your everyday life miserable. If you need to reinforce this trust, you need to take some initiative from your side.
    Consider these options

    1. Tattoo her initials on your back-side.
    2. Get a chastity belt and leave all the keys with her. Tell her that you will have it on at all times. However, do get an exemtion letter from the Emmigration authorities to go through airport metal detectors.
    3. Take your mother-in-law with you to New York.
    4. Quit your job and harass her for dowry.
    5. Enrol into spiritual classes that help you abstain from all forms of pleasure.
    6. Get drunk everyday. (It helps deal with the pressure and ensures no performance)
    7. Introduce her to your best looking friend and tell her that he will take your place and do all necessary till you come back. Like a deposit / replacement.

    Enjoy the big apple
    Consult Dr. Avinash Mittal in New Delhi. He is the best Psychiatrist I heard.
    My Personality depends on who I am.My Attitude depends on who you are.
    a_decent_1™ ©®

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Logical_Guru View Post
    A trust deficit between a newly married couple can have serious long term consequences and make your everyday life miserable. If you need to reinforce this trust, you need to take some initiative from your side.
    Consider these options

    1. Tattoo her initials on your back-side.
    2. Get a chastity belt and leave all the keys with her. Tell her that you will have it on at all times. However, do get an exemtion letter from the Emmigration authorities to go through airport metal detectors.
    3. Take your mother-in-law with you to New York.
    4. Quit your job and harass her for dowry.
    5. Enrol into spiritual classes that help you abstain from all forms of pleasure.
    6. Get drunk everyday. (It helps deal with the pressure and ensures no performance)
    7. Introduce her to your best looking friend and tell her that he will take your place and do all necessary till you come back. Like a deposit / replacement.

    Enjoy the big apple


    1. Tattoo her initials on your back-side.
    2. Get a chastity belt and leave all the keys with her. Tell her that you will have it on at all times. However, do get an exemtion letter from the Emmigration authorities to go through airport metal detectors.
    3. Take your mother-in-law with you to New York.
    4. Quit your job and harass her for dowry.
    5. Enrol into spiritual classes that help you abstain from all forms of pleasure.
    6. Get drunk everyday. (It helps deal with the pressure and ensures no performance)
    7. Introduce her to your best looking friend and tell her that he will take your place and do all necessary till you come back. Like a deposit / replacement.

    Enjoy the big apple

  7. #7
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    Red face

    she's feeling insecure...she's not insane but insecure...if u r planning to going away from her...it will only worsen the situation. show her ur love for her, be caring, affectionate. Also take her with u where ever u 've been posted. She will feel relieved. Don't ignore her

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    Well she loves you!! She loves u a lot, and she is afraid of staying away from you. Thats all its about. Why dont you take her also with you? rent a new home there, and u can stay together. Atleast for few days u will have to do that. Or visit her every weekend

  9. #9
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    Smile

    Are you relocating alone? Or are you taking her with? I am guessing that you're relocating alone, hence she is feeling so insecure. But I must say, she is generalizing wayyyy too much regarding men...! You really need to keep convincing her that you are 100% devoted to her and there is no reason for her to feel queasy. It'll take time. Show her all the love and support you possibly can. Keep in touch with her regularly, and make her feel that she is the prime of your life.
    Or if you're going to the US alone, you may consider taking her with you. But all in all, as your marriage matures and your intimacy and understanding continues to grow, I am sure her faith will grow too. Good luck, and congratulations on your promotion!

  10. #10
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    Hi

    As you have recently got married...she is obviously insecure...

    It takes time to build faith in a marriage..understand her insecurities of being in a new home, with new people, new responsibilities...you were her only closest and now you are going away...

    Here are few tips, which might help in making your marriage strong and this temporary parting a little bit easier

    key to a successful marriage is making major decisions as a couple. Making major decisions as a couple lessens the strains in your marriage. These major decisions include schooling for your children, career or job changes and purchasing a new car. When only one of the couples makes the decision, the couple might end up arguing why a decision was made without input from the other partner. Married couples are made to face life together, and they should also make major decisions as couples...

    There'll be times when you disagree and times when these disagreements cause pain. Sure, you shouldn't put up with addiction, violence or abuse. But if your partner simply wants something different from you or does something differently from you, you must resolve that.

    Successful married couples keep communicating, whatever the bad feeling between them. They negotiate differences and disagreements so that they both end up getting a fair deal. They smile and support each other rather than nag and whinge. They accept that sometimes, loving is more important than winning.




  11. #11
    New Born UrjaHalt's Avatar
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    May be u are not givng her enough respct and care and love. ANd she bleives she is not enough for you, and she feels like you will leave her for another woman at the first chance u get. I think thats this whole issue is about

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    SHe is a newly wed wife.. Its natural shebehaves heysterical when she hears about ur news for departure.
    The main reasons are two.. newly wed, and ur journy abroad.
    Eiether take her also with u, or comfort her by telling u will always be in touch. May be she is afraid u are cheating her etc.

  13. #13
    New Born k.singh's Avatar
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    I dont think she is questiong ur faith
    But its her insecurity. She is scared.. such insecurity occur from a heightened level of love. A person like something and he is afraid of losing it. Same situaiton is here also. U need to give her more assurance that u will be ewith her alway

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    Hmm. natural behavior . You can explain to her ur genuine feelings. promise to stay in touch. if possible get her visa arranged & try & take her with u.
    Live amongst people in such a manner that if you die they weep over you and if you are alive they crave for your company.

  15. #15
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    Well this is something that is part of a women if she herd that some one else's husband did this so it is not saf for her. Maybe she is not doubting you maybe she is doubting the girls in US thinking that they are American and they will have a way to get to you. So you really have to tell her that you love her and she means the world to you. Merriage is all about trust. If she cant trust you then I really don't what to say. If the issue is gone far then take her with you.

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