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Thread: Tension in relationship

  1. #1

    Default Tension in relationship

    Hi Preeto mam and everyone,

    I am 25F, in a relationship from 5.5 years around. We were in same city initially and from 3 years it is long distance one and we are planning for marriage as well..My guy's work life is tough as he is in core company. My problem is, we meet in 3-4 months once..and we get very less time to talk over phone...But from few months our interaction is reduced a lot. As per him, talking daily is not important, meeting often is not that important.I know he loves me...but if i ask him some daily life questions, he asks me to shut up as he is mature enough to take care of himself., if i give him a call twice in a day or so,he becomes furious, that i don't give him proper space...many a times he has told me that he doesn't like to share things and i should understand him the way he is... i am really scared how our future will be..if he gets irritated so frequently as i am a very emotional person. When i discuss with him he apologize and then again behave in same manner.. . We both want to live with each other..but i feel the respect and affection from his side is going down. So people i just want to know your views is this the work pressure or is after few years the charm and affection flew away.. How should i handle it..because these thoughts are killing me..

    Thanks in advance. take care guys

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Jun 2006
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    The thing is you know, that you've been in this relationship for a long time and are probably very familiar with each other, so he expects you to understand his situation and not be too demanding.
    You, on the other hand probably miss him and need more than just a conversation a day. So, there's where the dichotomy is. You will really both have to take time to re- connect and try and understand each other and the changed needs and requirements. This will have to be done in a calm sort of a way when you have time for the discussion. Once the communication is clear, you will be in a clearer state of mind about which way the relationship is headed and what aspects you both need to work on.

  3. #3
    New Born
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    Mar 2010
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    Look This is Not a Big Deal You Need to Take Some Proper Steps To Over Come This Situation!
    1) Let it be Even a Prime Minister,President or a CEO of a Comp. Every 1 does have a few moments to share with their LOved Ones. and i also expect to Do your Boy The Same For You.He must Value You and Your Time.Talking Few minutes a day even after knowing 5 or 6 years in not a big deal one can talk daily for to loved one so tell him to act Maturely.
    2) Get Over This Situation For Once Stop Repeating again and again.
    Hope u Talk with Him Soon and Everything Gets Better!

  4. #4
    New Born abhi5575's Avatar
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    May 2012
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    Only way to solve this is communicate more often, sit down take time and discuss about where its really going wrong. Coz its about future of both of u, and its better to be safe then sorry. comrpomise, becoz love aint overshadowing someone else's feeling with yours, it about sharing the same feeling alltogether. An if u think it aint going right it will end up some day for sure. So relax, tell him that u need some "me and u" time together n when u meet sort it out. hope all goes well

  5. #5
    New Born madmaxunleashed's Avatar
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    Nov 2012
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    come into few agreements with him -
    1. Everyday, on a particular time he / u will make the call and certain minutes of time have to be spent minimum on that conversation - which will be must from now on!
    2. Every month, one particular day, you need to has to be maintained, otherwise u tell him that it is not working out.....if he is so concerned about his own space, it is his duty to watch ur happiness also.
    3. Respect his space - dont ask any question which may irritate him / dont call him when he does not want u to.....I presume u know his nerves very well by this time!
    4. Moreover, u may think about applying the biggest weapon of women - TEARS!!! u know.....its all fair in love & war!!!

  6. #6
    SB Champion Lieutenant
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    Oct 2008
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    Hey girl you need to take a break from this relationship. You need to call him and tell him that you need a break from this relationship because of is attitude.

  7. #7
    New Born
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    Mar 2012
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    take a break girl. few months back even i was in ur situation. even i spoke with him and v fixed a time to spk everyday which never happened. later i came to know he was not at all interested in me. he just wanted a girl for time pass when he was in d same city n v broke up. so speak with him. ask him whether he is serious in this relationship or not. if u can give time for him why can't he give? its his duty to give u proper time. so please speak and clarify now itself.

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