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Thread: Girlfriends past with my boss

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    New Born sunny240's Avatar
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    Default Girlfriends past with my boss

    Am a 28 y.o. govt. employ.. Am dating a 28 y.o. girl colleague for past 1 year.. I joined this job 2 years back while she has been here for more than 8 years.. There are many people in our office who say that she used to have sexual relations with the head of our current office 5-6 years back who retired before i joined the department.. He was married and more than her fathers age.. Now i don't know how to ask her.. Is there any way how i can find the truth or make her confess without making a mess of our relation if it turns out to be false..

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    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Well...this is tough. It could be that there was something between them and it could also be that these are just rumours. But whatever it is, the question is that do you really need to know? If you are both good with each other and the past is not really impinging in any way, why not just let it be? Think about it.

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    SB Addict archer_paradise's Avatar
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    Do you have a problem with her having an affair with an older married man? Or do you have a problem with her past involvement with men altogether? Either way, if you are dating her for just an year, you cannot dream of having a long lasting relationship if you're both honest with each other.

    Sadly, women are not so forthcoming, and coaxing the truth out of her will only make you look desperate and old fashioned and finicky. Which will not be a good impression on your part since you both work with each other. And even if your relationship ends, office gossip will turn against you.

    So you would have to be cordial and break the relationship off if you find a hint of truth in her past and the rumors you heard.

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    1.Its her past, so it is not compulsory for her to tell you about it.
    2.You should believe more in your partner than any other people. They could be just lying to you.

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    use some agents to find her past and get woman. Agents can be paid agents (like private detectives) or ur friends etc..

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    Quote Originally Posted by masakhali View Post
    use some agents to find her past and get woman. Agents can be paid agents (like private detectives) or ur friends etc..
    Good suggestion.Using agents will work if u dont have the skills to get things directly,especially in your case..!

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    Quote Originally Posted by sdvohra View Post
    Good suggestion.Using agents will work if u dont have the skills to get things directly,especially in your case..!
    Thanks friend for appreciation. Sure Better to do good investigation than later crying

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    SB Addict archer_paradise's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by masakhali View Post
    use some agents to find her past and get woman. Agents can be paid agents (like private detectives) or ur friends etc..
    One of these most stupidest advises I've ever heard. You want a guy who is dating a girl for just an year to pay detectives to investigate his girlfriends day to day activities to come to the conclusion whether she did have an affair with her boss 5-6 years back.

    This is not only desperate but unethical/illegal and will ruin this guy's psyche and image forever.

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    Not stupid idea... but my best friend fell into such situation. He blindly loved such a girl who was lying about past, and later he was heartbroken, and he cried on my shoulders thinking about his mistake.. its always good to check the past to kow the real character of girl.. and if u cant do that directly then use detective agents.. Thats good idea...
    Quote Originally Posted by archer_paradise View Post
    One of these most stupidest advises I've ever heard. You want a guy who is dating a girl for just an year to pay detectives to investigate his girlfriends day to day activities to come to the conclusion whether she did have an affair with her boss 5-6 years back.This is not only desperate but unethical/illegal and will ruin this guy's psyche and image forever.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sunny240 View Post
    Am a 28 y.o. govt. employ.. Am dating a 28 y.o. girl colleague for past 1 year.. I joined this job 2 years back while she has been here for more than 8 years.. There are many people in our office who say that she used to have sexual relations with the head of our current office 5-6 years back who retired before i joined the department.. He was married and more than her fathers age.. Now i don't know how to ask her.. Is there any way how i can find the truth or make her confess without making a mess of our relation if it turns out to be false..
    Simple,
    Build up a story, tell her you heard people talking all this Sh*t and you are willing to confront them and take them to task. Look for her reaction to it. If she is angry and wants you to thrash them, she is clean. If she wants you to mind your own business, you're her +1 .. !!

    G'day
    Miss you Dadaji

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    Quote Originally Posted by sunny240 View Post
    Am a 28 y.o. govt. employ.. Am dating a 28 y.o. girl colleague for past 1 year.. I joined this job 2 years back while she has been here for more than 8 years.. There are many people in our office who say that she used to have sexual relations with the head of our current office 5-6 years back who retired before i joined the department.. He was married and more than her fathers age.. Now i don't know how to ask her.. Is there any way how i can find the truth or make her confess without making a mess of our relation if it turns out to be false..
    Peoples' pasts matter to some and to some they don't but if her past matters to you, you should definitely ask her and find out. There is nothing wrong with that. To some of us on here it might not matter even if she was a prostitute in the past but to some of us it might matter or if I murdered a bunch of people in my past, but I didn't kill anyone in my recent past and I am a reformed man now and asked for someone's daughter's or sister's hand in marriage, my past might matter to some and it might not matter to some, right? It depends on the individual.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sunny240 View Post
    Am a 28 y.o. govt. employ.. Am dating a 28 y.o. girl colleague for past 1 year.. I joined this job 2 years back while she has been here for more than 8 years.. There are many people in our office who say that she used to have sexual relations with the head of our current office 5-6 years back who retired before i joined the department.. He was married and more than her fathers age.. Now i don't know how to ask her.. Is there any way how i can find the truth or make her confess without making a mess of our relation if it turns out to be false..

    Well talk to her about it and see

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    Quote Originally Posted by sunny240 View Post
    Am a 28 y.o. govt. employ.. Am dating a 28 y.o. girl colleague for past 1 year.. I joined this job 2 years back while she has been here for more than 8 years.. There are many people in our office who say that she used to have sexual relations with the head of our current office 5-6 years back who retired before i joined the department.. He was married and more than her fathers age.. Now i don't know how to ask her.. Is there any way how i can find the truth or make her confess without making a mess of our relation if it turns out to be false..
    Follow my mantra !dont do any mistake ! USE THE SITUATION...!ask her to use her influence with her boss to get you a good job... you can also now get a good job and a fixed salary with ur girlfriends skills !

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    Bring up that guy in conversation with her and see how she talks about him. You would know if she is trying to hide something or talking freely. You can also talk about past relationships. Girls feel that guys don't like their part relationships and so they tend hide that. But you can convince her that you are okay with her past, she would reveal.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sunny240 View Post
    Am a 28 y.o. govt. employ.. Am dating a 28 y.o. girl colleague for past 1 year.. I joined this job 2 years back while she has been here for more than 8 years.. There are many people in our office who say that she used to have sexual relations with the head of our current office 5-6 years back who retired before i joined the department.. He was married and more than her fathers age.. Now i don't know how to ask her.. Is there any way how i can find the truth or make her confess without making a mess of our relation if it turns out to be false..
    Your girlfriends past is very thick so that your future with her is going to be troublesome
    You have no future with her due to her past. Find another girlfriend.

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