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Thread: Should I allow her or not?

  1. #1
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    Default Should I allow her or not?

    madam, i am a 27 year old boy from delhi,It has been 3 years for my marriage.I know that my wife talk on phone and SMS to her Ex for almost half an hour daily .althogh she tell me that she talks him but not the topics of talks.I love my wife very much but due to this there is creating a space in us.I hint her that i dont like that thing but probably she did ignore that.madam should i allow her to talk? or wat to do now/?

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Hi, yes, I understand your disquiet. Its an uncomfortable situation. But you know, forbidding her to talk may lead in her doing so secretly. What you can do is to communicate this sense of discomfort that you are feeling. You can say clearly that you are embarrassed and unhappy about the state of affairs. And you fear that it may impact your relationship. Let her make the decision. Also, please be clear about the fact that you'd rather that she speaks in front of you to her friend and not behind your back.

  3. #3
    :: The Zenith :: Lieutenant-Colonel
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    Why do you have to 'hint' her that she shudnt continue this? You are her husband and thus you reserve all rights to tell her bluntly that you do not like this thing and she should discontinue it..

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    SB Champion Lieutenant o00's Avatar
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    Tell her clearly that you don't want her to keep contact with her ex anymore and if you find out her talking to him secretly etc., you will not forgive her. Ask her to choose one- you or him. She doesn't have to cut off abruptly, ask her to reduce the frequency of contact slowly and then she can stop completely.

  5. #5
    Young Gun IzQueen's Avatar
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    According to me, your wife should know about what she's doing.. It sounds odd, although she is married, she's having contacts with her Ex... Of course it will have a negative effect in your relationship... Is that so important to have conversation with her ex..?? I think once a girl is settled down, she should take care of her house and adore her husband notjust wasting time like this..!! She can get into contact with her ex, if you permit her to... it's not good whatever she's doing... Stop her from now itself before it's too late... Make understand it may cause problem later between you two couples....

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    SB Addict RoleModel007's Avatar
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    There is a reason why we call the the 'EX'. It means to delete; to cross out someone from ones life. To still be friendly with them is creepy and not at-least when you are committed to someone else.
    In a serious committed relationship one does hold his/ her rights to tell the other what is good for both and what is not. Surely it would have been and issue for her too if you had switched places.
    So explain her that this situation makes things uncomfortable to you and tell it would be nice of her not to continue with that.

  7. #7
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    EX is 2/3rd of SEX.

  8. #8
    New Born nitinblurayfan's Avatar
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    Put your foot down and have a serious discussion with her. She's walking down a very dangerous road. It would have hard to bring up the conversation if the person was simply a male friend. But since he's an ex, you have to convince her not to. Preeto maam is right. Simply forbidding her will cause her to do it behind your back which is much worse. The worst scenario is the feelings which she had for him earlier might begin to pop up again.

  9. #9
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    You can't forbid her at all because then she will like maam said do it secretly so talk to her about it and see if she can change it. He was her ex there is no dinal in that and maybe they are just good friends. So just talk to her nicely and tell her that you are not very confortable with this.

  10. #10
    ♥ fєmmє fαtαlє ♥ Major Sweet Mimi's Avatar
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    Hmmm you shoud have took a big firm that you dont like it in fact you dont want her to have contact with her ex!!! and ask her if i talk to some girl daily how you'll feel about it!! loving someone a lot doesnt mean you should make yourself become a fool!! because very often the one we love a lot itself hurt us!!!! so take a stand for this!! dont let things go on like this!! because as far as there is a third party be it ex or not.. your partner will obviously have a diverted mind..


    and you know problems becomes difficult to resolve!! why? because when there is no third party when a fight occurs at one point she will come towards you as she will feel alone but when there exist someone with whom she can talk, she wont come so easily and like this many relationships get into trouble!!!
    I'm a shhh girl
    Loving me could be a crime

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