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Thread: Trust issues with women

  1. #1
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    Default Trust issues with women

    I grew up in an orthodox-traditional lower middle class family. I was the eldest son and was taught not to be distracted by 'the other things in life' and was 'strictly asked' to purely concentrate on my studies and career. I was promised the 'earthly pleasures' will happen when it is supposed to happen. I did fairly well, worked hard, earned a living for my people and kept them happy. Time passes quickly and now I'm almost 30.

    Problem started when the girl I was supposed to get engaged last year was put to end when my cousin showed a mobile camera capture (video) of her doing it with my cousin and another guy together. I called of the proposal without citing the actual reason to any of the parties.

    Now all I do is waste my time searching for filth in internet and breaking my head over it. I feel left out 'cause I think every human being under the sun is doing it. I tried to overcome it by making myself jump into it. But every-time my mind disagrees with me. I have trust issues with women right now. I feel my people have cheated me on my childhood and adulthood.
    What am I supposed to do to overcome this?

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    Many decisions taken in our childhood by our elders are relevant to that period. They are supposed to be good for us and it is immature to judge their wisdom. What is the whole world doing? Cheating or Having Sex? If they are unmarried and having sex, without being in a relationship, this is not cheating. It is a personal preference. If you have not done it, you have not missed much and still have another good 30 years to make up. If your trust issues with women are so biased, just based on a single such incident, you may consider Men. You will find that there is not much of a difference when it comes to loyalty. You should only hold yourself responsible. And you will realize that it is tougher to forgive oneself, than forgive others. So, stop feeling bitter and look for that special person without being biased or judgmental.

    Logical Guru is the internationally renowned, right thinking moral source of good advice on all topics related to Sex, Spirituality, Matrimony, Religion, International Travel and the Law

  3. #3
    GO SPURS GO! Brigadier General galaxy_resident's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I grew up in an orthodox-traditional lower middle class family. I was the eldest son and was taught not to be distracted by 'the other things in life' and was 'strictly asked' to purely concentrate on my studies and career. I was promised the 'earthly pleasures' will happen when it is supposed to happen. I did fairly well, worked hard, earned a living for my people and kept them happy. Time passes quickly and now I'm almost 30.

    Problem started when the girl I was supposed to get engaged last year was put to end when my cousin showed a mobile camera capture (video) of her doing it with my cousin and another guy together. I called of the proposal without citing the actual reason to any of the parties.

    Now all I do is waste my time searching for filth in internet and breaking my head over it. I feel left out 'cause I think every human being under the sun is doing it. I tried to overcome it by making myself jump into it. But every-time my mind disagrees with me. I have trust issues with women right now. I feel my people have cheated me on my childhood and adulthood.
    What am I supposed to do to overcome this?
    Your decision to call off the engagement definitely had a bad effect on you, as far as I can see. So do take your time to get over this. Not every girl is like this, look around you. Just one bad experience doesnt mean the end of the world for you. Whether people have cheated on your childhood and adulthood its debatable, but its creditable that you, avoiding all distractions have made a successful career. You should be proud of yourself. Have faith in yourself and take your time for forgetting what happened. You definitely will get a nice girl.
    Fight your Fears and you will be in Battle Forever
    Control your Fears and you will be Free Forever



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    SB Champion Lieutenant o00's Avatar
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    You have got 2 best advises right above this. I just want to emphasize that every one is not like that girl and you have not lost anything. You have everything and be proud of it. I have seen may people getting married first time in their early thirties. Start looking for matrimonial matches again..use internet for something good.

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    ok tell us what is the problem ur family or girl. First resolve issues with your family and then find a girl Take care

  6. #6
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    Talk to your family and take a break go off for a vacation and clean up your mind man!this thing is going to eat you from within,trust me with this

    not all women are like this I read somewhere that dont try to understand woman!they do and they hate each other

    anyway
    this is not the end of the world,you're 30 and yes you need to get married!

    Look for a girl and talk to her,talking to anyone reveals a lot about them and you gotta do the same thing
    Best of Luck

  7. #7
    Bullet Raja Major General Gudu Gudu Returns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I grew up in an orthodox-traditional lower middle class family. I was the eldest son and was taught not to be distracted by 'the other things in life' and was 'strictly asked' to purely concentrate on my studies and career. I was promised the 'earthly pleasures' will happen when it is supposed to happen. I did fairly well, worked hard, earned a living for my people and kept them happy. Time passes quickly and now I'm almost 30.

    Problem started when the girl I was supposed to get engaged last year was put to end when my cousin showed a mobile camera capture (video) of her doing it with my cousin and another guy together. I called of the proposal without citing the actual reason to any of the parties.

    Now all I do is waste my time searching for filth in internet and breaking my head over it. I feel left out 'cause I think every human being under the sun is doing it. I tried to overcome it by making myself jump into it. But every-time my mind disagrees with me. I have trust issues with women right now. I feel my people have cheated me on my childhood and adulthood.
    What am I supposed to do to overcome this?
    Thank that mobile phone which showed what was in store for you in the future.

    Thank your stars that you did not get married to that girl.

    Forget that something happened like that.

    Try concentrating on your future, find a nice girl, do background checks, make a life.

    By the way, I could not make out what connection has that video got to do with you searching for porn on the net?

    Perhaps you imagined yourself doing it. These are signs of an illness whose name I do not wish to take.

    Time to get real. Find a good nice girl and DY.
    आपका अपना,
    ಗುಡ್ ಬಾಯ್ Gudu

  8. #8
    SB Addict RoleModel007's Avatar
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    Move on son. You have just hit a small bump on the road. That doesn't mean it has to ruin the entire journey for you. Nothing has lost for you yet. You are just 30, your life begins now. So go out there and have some fun (within limits off-course).

    Plus, seems like you've done pretty well in your life. You should be thanking your parents for that.
    And stop stereotyping and being judgmental. One person's action doesn't mean that all should end up doing the same.

  9. #9
    confused soul Captain ariesgirl's Avatar
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    every girl is not like her..logical guru has given you the best reply..look for a bride..marry her..fall in love with her..live happily..

  10. #10
    SB Addict Inspector Pathan's Avatar
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    You didnot end up being her husband end of story . Move on . Now a days there are so many options by which u can find someone either start the search on the net or start going out to form a social circle . you will find the right person. what you are doing on net is not the solution .

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