Husband avoiding me since 2 years

[Unregistered]

First and foremost , i like this forum and its concept and the way mods and people help others. Great work.

I am a married girl , we have a 3 year old boy as our child . off late my husband avoids me completely. we dont get physical for weeks and its on my insistence that we make love once in 15-20 days. i feel bad that i have to make him remember this thing which is so important to have a good bond. even when i ask him to make love he at first tries to avoid it and i have to persuade him for a couple of days to make out.

i some times feel that he has some affair but he completely denied it , i tried to get info from few of his friends which include females and they said no does not have any. this is been going since past 2 years. i feel terrible and i shared it with my mom and she said theres no need of sex after 6 years of marriage.. this thing reduces and ultimately stops in 10 odd years of marriage.

i dont agree to it and believe that a relation has to be kept same in all aspects. yes some thing reduces with time but love should not be one of them. how can i get under his skin and get why he is doing it all.

[Preeto Maam]

So, he's not having an affair, or that's what it seems and he's lost all interest in sex. That's not the sign of a healthy marriage and not good for you at all. Of course, sex does not come to an end after you are married for any length of time.
So, now, you can either try and do without it- as per your mom's advise- or try and get to the bottom of this behaviour. A marriage counsellor may help, specially if your husband is not willing to discuss the matter with you. Do try and contact one and make him go, saying that its a serious issue with you.

[o00]

You didn't tell us about his lifestyle. Is his work very stressful etc.?

[rhythmic]

Yeah, stress can be a killer of romance.

Another aspect to analyse is - check whether other aspects of your relationship is all right. Are you still having quality times together? Talks and discussions? May be that, he's unable to get into the mood. And baby taking most of the relaxed hours of your lives - in that case, you guys need to talk and sort it out together. Find out whether he's holding any grudge?

Another more aspect is - if your baby was delivered normally (without a C section) there are chances that the tightness is lost to some extent (which can anyways be brought back), and even if it can't be brought back, the style and the positions of penetration may need to be experimented. Google for kegel exercises and you will get complete info about it. Talk with your hubby if this is the matter.

[Inspector Pathan]

what has happened that his charm of making love has faded away either after the birth of your child or with the passage of time many men loose interest in such things as they just think of themselves as breadwinner for the rest of their life.over here you have to compromise. what you can do is keep your charm alive and when ever you get the chance just grab it.

one more point may be your husband was not a man with lot of sex appeal you see some are like snail and some are like beasts.

[barbiedoll]

Yeah, stress can be a killer of romance.

Another aspect to analyse is - check whether other aspects of your relationship is all right. Are you still having quality times together? Talks and discussions? May be that, he's unable to get into the mood. And baby taking most of the relaxed hours of your lives - in that case, you guys need to talk and sort it out together. Find out whether he's holding any grudge?

Another more aspect is - if your baby was delivered normally (without a C section) there are chances that the tightness is lost to some extent (which can anyways be brought back), and even if it can't be brought back, the style and the positions of penetration may need to be experimented. Google for kegel exercises and you will get complete info about it. Talk with your hubby if this is the matter.

Cant answer better than this!!

[Shravan6886]

There can be ample lot of reasons for his loss of interest in $ex that doesn't mean he is having an affair. May be life has become too routine for him, so spice up things for him a little bit and see.

And also don't connect Love with $ex, if u don't have $ex it doesn't mean that u don't love a person right.