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Thread: Tell me whether its right or wrong?

  1. #1

    Default Tell me whether its right or wrong?

    Dear Preeto Mam,
    i am a regular reader of ur page, but i am really in bad situation plz help me.
    i was in a relationship with a guy who was in depression due to his past experiences and career. when i entered in relationship i knew it
    i thought my love and moral support help him to come out of it....but from the very begining his family and he himself was of the view
    that i should proceed further only if i will marry him ..i agreed. but after 2 years the guy still didnt cop up with it and i was pressurized to get
    married to him without getting him settled. my family was ready to wait and even i was ready to wait for his settlement but he
    is so much insecure and i dont knw wat is his problm that the only thing he want to do is marry me and nothing else. the pressure increased
    and i denied that i'll not marry u...u didnt done anything during relationship(wrt his life and career). i did everything to help him and supported him and his family. now when i said no everyone is blaming me that i have played with his emotions. he is still in depression i feel guilty sometimes....

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Hi! Look, its not a question of if it is right or wrong generally, but if it is right for you. It is hard to marry a depressed person who has no committment to making anything of his life. You say you have supported him for long and that's good. But you do have your own life to live. The only thing is that you have to make sure that he does no harm to himself. You may have to put his support systems in place before you withdraw from the relationship.

  3. #3
    « rahmaniac » Lieutenant-Colonel ariesgirl's Avatar
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    You haven't done anything needn't feel just can't spoil your life..your need is genuine..if he doesn't understand it and if he doesn't want to achieve something that never count as your fault..

  4. #4
    ♥ fєmmє fαtαlє ♥ Major Sweet Mimi's Avatar
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    He should get ready financially to marry you.. you just need to tell him this and make it clear. of course you cant marry someone who is unsettled...

    life is not a joke let him know this... he is being childish.... you are totally right in your place..
    I'm a shhh girl
    Loving me could be a crime

  5. #5
    SB Addict archer_paradise's Avatar
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    You should always do what you find comfortable. His depression has nothing to do with you. You are no superhero. As a matter of fact, without him being in correct mental/physical or financial state, him being in a sorry state of affairs, could lead to a worser married life

  6. #6
    SB Champion Captain o00's Avatar
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    There is no fault of yours. You did what you felt right. People will blame you and say stuff, you gotta ignore them. They are a saw which has teeth on both sides. Better move away for a while and take a break.

  7. #7
    SB Champion Lieutenant Inspector Pathan's Avatar
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    Jan 2013
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    you did the right thing no need to worry if he is not willing to change himself for better change your path

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