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Thread: I have everything in life but no GF.

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    Default I have everything in life but no GF.

    I am a 28 year old guy. I work in an IT company and earn fairly well. I used to be a very serious guy regarding studies at school and particularly during college days where I was working towards some ambition and neglected all social life. I therefore never had a girlfriend since I was in 10th standard where I had to dump her due to typical Indian non-modern mentality of my parents.
    I feel really lonely and wish I had someone to share my feelings with and talk on a day to day basis. I am not looking for sex as I have it regularly on most weekends (with hookers). Because of this I am very insecure whenever I see someone else with a girl. Also, I know if I marry, these days its next to impossible to get a good looking girl with no history of relationships. So before I get married, I want to be secure -- know that I did the same things as my wife so I can be ok with her history. Its not like girls never liked me, I had always had girls telling me directly or indirectly at all phases in my life that they wanted a relationship -- at those times I was really into achieving my goals and turned away all of them.

    So now the issue is -- How do I get a GF? Where do I start looking? I work in a small office so there are not any single and uncommitted girls that I know of. I don't live an extrovert lifestyle, have no friends (actually I am taking medication for depression and anxiety). I don't have the social skills and don't go out. Anyone has any practical experience regarding this? How do you find potential eligible women for such sort of thing?

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Hi! look, if girls like you and you are attractive to them, then there should not be a big problem. The problem could be the fact that you are out with hookers on the weekends but you want your lady to not have had a 'history'. Ever think about how your lady will feel about the hookers?
    See, you really need to get yourself straightened out before you 'start looking'. Are you really ready for a relationship? A relationship entails a lot of adjustment and compromise and understanding- whether or not there is a 'history'. Don't you think so?

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    Thank You Preeto mam for replying.
    To start with, I am not proud of my addiction to hookers, its more of a necessity to deal with as there isn't anyone who could help me satisfy my manly needs elsewhere. I might leave this lifestyle if I get into some committed relationship. And only one more guy other than me knows about this lifestyle about me and he has been a willing participant once, so I doubt my woman will ever get to know about this. Also, I don't have an issue with my wife having a history as long as I also have one-- one of the reasons I want a committed relationship.
    And I think yes I can put in the required commitment but don't know where to start -- I know many girls find me attractive but things stays till there. I don't know what to say to them, I am not approachable as I stay by myself and don't interact with people. Also, girls who are coworkers always have higher expectations so I cant hope of much happening there. I wonder how guys approach all these decent women and end up with a relationship, particularly the average joes..

    Can some love guru help here??

    Thanks

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    Quote Originally Posted by KnightInArmour View Post
    I am a 28 year old guy. I work in an IT company and earn fairly well. I used to be a very serious guy regarding studies at school and particularly during college days where I was working towards some ambition and neglected all social life. I therefore never had a girlfriend since I was in 10th standard where I had to dump her due to typical Indian non-modern mentality of my parents.
    I feel really lonely and wish I had someone to share my feelings with and talk on a day to day basis. I am not looking for sex as I have it regularly on most weekends (with hookers). Because of this I am very insecure whenever I see someone else with a girl. Also, I know if I marry, these days its next to impossible to get a good looking girl with no history of relationships. So before I get married, I want to be secure -- know that I did the same things as my wife so I can be ok with her history. Its not like girls never liked me, I had always had girls telling me directly or indirectly at all phases in my life that they wanted a relationship -- at those times I was really into achieving my goals and turned away all of them.

    So now the issue is -- How do I get a GF? Where do I start looking? I work in a small office so there are not any single and uncommitted girls that I know of. I don't live an extrovert lifestyle, have no friends (actually I am taking medication for depression and anxiety). I don't have the social skills and don't go out. Anyone has any practical experience regarding this? How do you find potential eligible women for such sort of thing?
    i will say wen u take time to get involved with hookers then y dont u use tht time to search gf. start socializing. join parties, join music class. there is no dearth os single gal. u only have to say hi and wait 4 ur opportunity.

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    Quote Originally Posted by KnightInArmour View Post
    I am a 28 year old guy. I work in an IT company and earn fairly well. I used to be a very serious guy regarding studies at school and particularly during college days where I was working towards some ambition and neglected all social life. I therefore never had a girlfriend since I was in 10th standard where I had to dump her due to typical Indian non-modern mentality of my parents.
    I feel really lonely and wish I had someone to share my feelings with and talk on a day to day basis. I am not looking for sex as I have it regularly on most weekends (with hookers). Because of this I am very insecure whenever I see someone else with a girl. Also, I know if I marry, these days its next to impossible to get a good looking girl with no history of relationships. So before I get married, I want to be secure -- know that I did the same things as my wife so I can be ok with her history. Its not like girls never liked me, I had always had girls telling me directly or indirectly at all phases in my life that they wanted a relationship -- at those times I was really into achieving my goals and turned away all of them.

    So now the issue is -- How do I get a GF? Where do I start looking? I work in a small office so there are not any single and uncommitted girls that I know of. I don't live an extrovert lifestyle, have no friends (actually I am taking medication for depression and anxiety). I don't have the social skills and don't go out. Anyone has any practical experience regarding this? How do you find potential eligible women for such sort of thing?
    Buddy the only way to get a girl in India is if you marry her.end of story.

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    SB Wizard Captain o00's Avatar
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    You are so concerned about your future partner's history and you also wanna have a same history. Well if that's the case, then you should be able to accept any girl who has been using the service from male escorts/gigolos. Anyway, make a matrimonial profile and get married with any girl who you find suitable. There is no sale of GFs and you wont be able to find one as you would have already found one if you were capable.

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    The moment you get one - You lose everything in life -

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    Quote Originally Posted by o00 View Post
    You are so concerned about your future partner's history and you also wanna have a same history. Well if that's the case, then you should be able to accept any girl who has been using the service from male escorts/gigolos. Anyway, make a matrimonial profile and get married with any girl who you find suitable. There is no sale of GFs and you wont be able to find one as you would have already found one if you were capable.
    Thank you all for your constructive (and destructive) comments.
    A) People who use call girls/hookers are not losers. In-fact the best and most expensive ones are used by the most successful people in the society.
    B) If you feel getting laid with a hooker in India is easy, go out and try it. You will either end up in a Police Station or be conned -- Its not for the fattus and the faint-hearted.
    C) Using hookers is not the only facet of my personality, nor something I am proud of, so judging someone solely on the basis of this facet alone shows the extent of the grasp of your own mind.
    D) I just came here to seek advice on where to approach girls these days as I am out of this scene for long, I haven't found a single person who knows about that -- reflective of your own capabilities.
    And, BTW, I won't have problems marrying a girl who has been with male escorts either. There is a big difference between satisfying physical urges and love. Its clear you are incapable of comprehending it. As far as my capability of getting a gf is concerned, well its not me who has 800+ posts on a digital forum, I do have a life and I know what I am capable of, you don't need to tell me that although your opinion is no more valuable that a passing fart in the wind. If you had a real life, you would not be here.

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    LOL Man. Nice one.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Logical_Guru View Post
    The moment you get one - You lose everything in life -
    LOL Man. Nice one.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mysticmantra View Post
    i will say wen u take time to get involved with hookers then y dont u use tht time to search gf. start socializing. join parties, join music class. there is no dearth os single gal. u only have to say hi and wait 4 ur opportunity.
    Thanks man, appreciate the advice..

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    Man I usually read queries here, but don't respond; for your query; I don't know why I am compelled to respond. First all the people who are preaching here about hookers; its completely all right in all the societies of this world; we Indians mostly make hue and cry about it; though if they had guts or when they go to Thailand or Singapore or anywhere in this world; this is the first thing they start looking for; all will disagree; but all knows what's written here is absolute truth, just don't wanna accept it.

    Now to your problem, its a genuine problem and many of my friends are in similar state of mind; I talk to them and suggest whatever I can with my limited experience and capabilities. First thing first; you have to make a list of all the girls you liked in your past; or they are in your friendlist of facebook; then zeored down on those who live in 100 kms radius of your residence (radius you can decide as per your convenience; I think I can go till 100 kms to meet a new girl). Well; after this process; you first find all of those who are not married yet. then after this process you will realize that most of them are in committed relationship or show like that.

    Now starts the next phase: start pinging them once in a while; liking their pictures; writing some witty comments which can make them smile; and turn the notifications on when they come online.

    Just ping them to discuss things of their interest (Keep a watch what they post online; kitties, salman, Virat, or even Modi); whatever you have to keep a watch what they are posting and frame your first communication on the basis of this. (Till this process; I am hopeful you are talking to 2-3 girls together..)..

    Beware; never ever flirt in these intial chats, just show them a genuine interest in whatever they post or like and strike a communication around it.

    This is tiring process; don't be disheartened because of reluctant replies; and be aware that once upon a time you like them

    Then the next step is (after 1-2 weeks of normal chat) ; try to tell them about the sad part of your life once in a while (how your girlfriend ditched you..how you were so devoted..so caring...so trustworthy.. its all about selling your qualities!)

    Get to know where their current relationship lacks, note down those points; prove yourself to be smarter where this is missing (Look many girls (Not all! that's where you have to play your cards) in this world looks for perfection; even though they know its not possible but they are rarely satisfied with their boyfriends; specially if its been a long relationship because of less calls, lack of appreciation and all); you have to start appreciating her from now onwards, not directly; but indirect subtle appreciations.

    Ohh man; Sorry I think I posted too much; its because my friends call me love guru and some of them really had success with my advise (Touch-wood).

    And incase; I came to know that you used same tricks on my girlfriend, I kill you then and there..

    Goodluck, don't hesitate to ask if you have specific questions!

    I appreciate the experience Preeto ma'am bring to the table; but I think this time her response was not helpful.
    Last edited by castrator; 31-10-2013 at 03:05 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by KnightInArmour View Post
    I am a 28 year old guy. I work in an IT company and earn fairly well. I used to be a very serious guy regarding studies at school and particularly during college days where I was working towards some ambition and neglected all social life. I therefore never had a girlfriend since I was in 10th standard where I had to dump her due to typical Indian non-modern mentality of my parents.
    I feel really lonely and wish I had someone to share my feelings with and talk on a day to day basis. I am not looking for sex as I have it regularly on most weekends (with hookers). Because of this I am very insecure whenever I see someone else with a girl. Also, I know if I marry, these days its next to impossible to get a good looking girl with no history of relationships. So before I get married, I want to be secure -- know that I did the same things as my wife so I can be ok with her history. Its not like girls never liked me, I had always had girls telling me directly or indirectly at all phases in my life that they wanted a relationship -- at those times I was really into achieving my goals and turned away all of them.

    So now the issue is -- How do I get a GF? Where do I start looking? I work in a small office so there are not any single and uncommitted girls that I know of. I don't live an extrovert lifestyle, have no friends (actually I am taking medication for depression and anxiety). I don't have the social skills and don't go out. Anyone has any practical experience regarding this? How do you find potential eligible women for such sort of thing?
    Those who dont have a gf, they cry. Those who have a gf, they die.

  14. #14
    SB Wizard Captain o00's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KnightInArmour View Post
    Thank you all for your constructive (and destructive) comments.
    A) People who use call girls/hookers are not losers. In-fact the best and most expensive ones are used by the most successful people in the society.
    B) If you feel getting laid with a hooker in India is easy, go out and try it. You will either end up in a Police Station or be conned -- Its not for the fattus and the faint-hearted.
    C) Using hookers is not the only facet of my personality, nor something I am proud of, so judging someone solely on the basis of this facet alone shows the extent of the grasp of your own mind.
    D) I just came here to seek advice on where to approach girls these days as I am out of this scene for long, I haven't found a single person who knows about that -- reflective of your own capabilities.
    And, BTW, I won't have problems marrying a girl who has been with male escorts either. There is a big difference between satisfying physical urges and love. Its clear you are incapable of comprehending it. As far as my capability of getting a gf is concerned, well its not me who has 800+ posts on a digital forum, I do have a life and I know what I am capable of, you don't need to tell me that although your opinion is no more valuable that a passing fart in the wind. If you had a real life, you would not be here.
    Dang!! you are so vulnerable man.. and BTW why did you quote me? I don't think A, B, C and some part of D apply to me. I hope you were not loaded with those pills while replying

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    Quote Originally Posted by castrator View Post
    And incase; I came to know that you used same tricks on my girlfriend, I kill you then and there..

    No Man, I take my oath of loyalty of never seducing your girlfriend....

    There are millions of other women out there--thanks for the strategy man, it is the most practical piece of advice I ever read regarding this topic. I will try putting this in practice. Issue is going by the filtering process, I don't think I will be able to draw any list. I know some girls who like me and have hinted in the past about it, but I don't find them attractive, the ones I do are either married or committed or too far. But I think its pretty good if you can chat up some girl, add her on facebook initially, then take things from there. I will be back in your PM box when I need more advice from thee love guru..

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