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Thread: How can I make eye contact with people?

  1. #1
    LookI
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    Default How can I make eye contact with people?

    Im 26 male and not necessarily shy nor am I scared to talk or act in public. Im not social though. I do have a lot of issues but this is not the place to discuss it. One major issue I have is:-

    I cannot look people in the eye. I always look down when I walk and when I talk. I have no motivation to talk to anyone men/women and I always thought thats the reason. But its now becoming too gay. Im not coy or feminine in that respect but I just dont make face contact. If I really have to, I look into the space near their faces and barely look into someones eyes.

    Any exercises that can help me?

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Hi! making eye contact with people is an essential part of social interaction. The first thing As with anything else, the more you think about it, the more self-conscious you'll become.
    Switching from left to right and back all the time will make you appear insecure, inattentive, and confused. It may help to prefer the left eye, because the right side of the brain controls emotions but controls the left side of the body.
    Just look directly into the person's eye in a relaxed manner. Remind yourself that you are hoping to have a pleasant conversation with this person -- there's no need to be anxious.
    Also, focus completely on what that person is saying, you won't have to worry about making eye contact correctly. If you are truly listening, you will just naturally focus your eyes on his/her eyes.
    These small ways will help you concentrate and make eye contact. Try them out!

  3. #3
    SB Champion Lieutenant Inspector Pathan's Avatar
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    you just have to concentrate nothing else......while someone is talking.....avoid looking down...it will come to you slowly but surely.......good luck.....

  4. #4
    Bullet Raja Major General Gudu Gudu Returns's Avatar
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    Lagta he tumko ghoooooorne ki aadat he. Galat time.. Galat jagah pe ghoorliya lagta he. Maar padi toh kissy se Aankh milane ki jurrat nahi horahi tumko. Abbey Sharma naam he kya tera? Jo Sharma raha he

    Me remember Sarkaar picture ka dialogue...SELVAR MANI TO RASHEED. "AAAEEE KOOOR [GHOOOOOOR] MAT... TUM LOGON KI BAAT MEIN AAGAYA.. KYA RE.. UNNO KON MALUM.. UNNO SARKAAR. UNHE TOUCH KARE TOH HAMEIN REHNA KI UNO REHNA.. Aeeee koooor mat"

    Toh hamare kehneka tatparya yeah he ki.. Koorne se kuch nahi hota.. Toh bindaaas koor. Just make a note.. Never koor at woman who is feeding baby. Baaki chalta he.. Warna bhaagna toh aata he na

    Boy you asked about exercise. Here you go.. SEX IS BEST EXERCISE.. GYM VIM AAL ZERO BEFORE SEX. BEST EXERCISE EVA.. HAVE SEX..full taka tak...

    don't know if it help motivate you in kooring ie ghooring aka staring people in the eye.. But I guarantee it make you feel relaxed n good n lite!!


    Jyaada bhi koooor mat Selvar Mani gooosa hoyega


    Happy staring
    आपका अपना,
    Gudu Gudu ರಿಟರ್ನ್ಸ್

  5. #5
    New Born mumbaiplayer's Avatar
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    Don't act like a gay. if you are talking to a girl stare at her t*ts. then let her know you like them and ask to get her number. Call her back later and BOOM you will have a good night

  6. #6
    Bourne Captain RoleModel007's Avatar
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    1. I can give you advice like wear shaded glasses or speak to mirror or use dummy/ playground like close friends to practice, but then again you would be just masking your issue rather than working on it.

    2. Your issues boils down to these -
    a) You lack self confidence
    b) You are thoughts are overtaken by your sense of insecurity
    c) You are living in denial.

    3. Be proud of what you are and what you have been. You can also improve certain things by working on your self - Retail therapy, improve speech quality, add humour, gym subscription.

    4. Don't let you mind wander thinking how people are going to judge you based on your behaviour/ attitude. In other words - Simply, don't give a fcuk!!!

  7. #7
    SB Guru Lieutenant-Colonel
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    Hi

    Failing to make eye contact suggests to some that you're shy; to others, it indicates rudeness or boredom. This skill is especially important when you are at a job interview; the employer will think you're hiding something or you're not confident, and most likely they will not hire you. Although this process is as natural as breathing for many people, it's difficult for many others...

    Few things you can try..... which might help

    You might be making more eye contact than you think...


    You can accomplish quite a bit without making ideal eye contact..ll things being equal, making good eye contact is better than not doing it, but I'd hardly say it's a factor that will completely make or break your social success. If someone has many of other things going for them socially, the fact that they sometimes look away from someone while they're talking to them isn't going to be a huge deal. If you wish your eye contact was better then by all means work on it, but don't agonize over it too much.

    Try to get into the habit of making more eye contact gradually, not all at once

    Try using the TV as practice -You don't even have to start with real people. When you're watching TV try to make eye contact with all the characters on the screen the way you'd focus on a conversational partner in real life.

    It's easier to make eye contact with people who don't intimidate you. Like most people, you likely get more flustered looking an attractive or high-status person in the eye compared to chatting to your parents or friends. You could tell yourself that it's okay if you can't make eye contact with more imposing people right off the bat, and that you'll work on that later.


  8. #8
    SB Champion Captain o00's Avatar
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    Why do you think eye contact is necessary?
    You never know what you can become ..

  9. #9
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    Start slow: 1. Get a mirror. Look at yourself and talk to yourself or sing to yourself. But look at your face, your eyes while doing this. Practice it whenever you get a chance. 2. Then talk to a statue/stuffed animal/someone on TV/a family member. Look them in the face and talk. 3. Talk to your friends on the phone but hold a mirror so you can see your face while talking. 4. Talk to your friends and look occasionally at their face, then for a good 5 seconds, then for 10 seconds, etc. 5. Once you can comfortable talk to your friend, then talk to a stranger (a shop keeper, the milk man, the newspaper man) and look at their face. 6. Finally, talk to your colleagues at work during lunch and look at their faces. Start slow and practice. Everytime you look down, force your head straight.

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