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Thread: The career girl or the homely girl?

  1. #1
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    Default The career girl or the homely girl?

    Hello everyone.. i am confused between two girls for marriage.. please tell me...
    The first girl - she is average looking.. she has good education(B.Tech) and is working in MNC earning (5-6 lpa).
    The Second girl - She is very beautiful but she has done BA and is teacher (earning 10k per month), wants to be housewife. But the girl is very cheerful and i liked her a lot.

    I am confused as i am not able to decide which one to select for Arrange marriage. Both the girls have agreed. I am not able to make decision - service wali vs housewife. I am an average middle class person with decent salary. Service wife will have good cash flows to house but won't work in house at all. But our kids will have lots of money. So financial condition will be very good. Negative - We might have ego issues in future etc. etc. as it happens in all household.
    Housewife is also good but she will do nothing just make food which i don't want.. But life will be peaceful.. no fights.. i want that my wife also work (may not earn well but still kuch to earn kare)..

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Reading what you've written it looks like you've already made up your mind actually. Jokes apart, this is a decision that you have to take. You need to know what your needs and expectations from your life partner are and at the same time if you both get along well. So, its really your call.

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    SB Guru Major ace of base's Avatar
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    You have a wrong notion about marraige and things to come. Whoever gave you that idea that working women will have ego clashes at home and a housewife will not have quarrels at home is a big fool!
    If you get married with this mentality then the root cause of all the problems at home will be you and not the girl who comes in !
    Working women can leave their job and prefer to stay at home and a women who wants to be a housewife can certainly go and work if she feels so.
    Compactibility in a marriage is what matters and not who work or dosent work. Choose the one whom you feel will understand you..
    NEVER CHASE LOVE,ATTENTION OR AFFECTION. IF IT IS NOT GIVEN FREELY BY ANOTHER PERSON,ITS ISNT WORTH HAVING...

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    Quote Originally Posted by ace of base View Post
    Compactibility in a marriage is what matters and not who work or dosent work. Choose the one whom you feel will understand you..
    Absolutely bang on I agree with this statement. Compatibility & mental alignment is extremely important for a life time decision like getting married. You have to decide which one goes best along with you. Also understand that human being is not arithmetic. You have to take a person as a whole, you cannot have best of all the worlds when you are getting married to someone. This holds true for both man & woman. There will certain plusses & minuses in any human being. One needs to go for the person where he/she feels the plusses are higher compared to the minuses. Then a happy married life can be expected.

    If you marry a working woman who according to you brings in loads of money, you should able to keep 1-2 servants to manage all household work? Where is the issue with this? On the other hand, a homely girl as you say is earning about 10K per month can always upgrade herself & go for more. So take a well thought out & calculated decision regards whom you would feel would be a better life partner.

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    « rahmaniac » Lieutenant-Colonel ariesgirl's Avatar
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    You said you like the latter one...then go for her... You can encourage her to work after marriage too... And a teacher won't definitely have work as hectic as that of an IT professional.. No night shifts.. Teachers will get more holidays plus summer holidays too... In the present world,it's always better that both husband and wife are earning... We have seen many teachers who are good at home management which includes bringing up kids too.. She too can do that... Or else your parents or her parents can stay along and take care of the baby/babies in future...
    choose the one you really liked... But whoever it is,encourage her to work post marriage too because in the long run,it would be a good decision..also,your wife wouldn't have to ask you money for her personal needs...
    Give people roses while they can still smell them. . .

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    A house wife is not the one who just cooks. She is a home maker. Family maker. It is more tedious then earning few bucks. Any how things would change for you the moment you have kids and you would want your earning wife to take care of kids for couple of years. To be frank respect a lady who has decided to let go of her dreams to make your dreams , your family and your career.

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    SB Guru Major rv102938's Avatar
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    Noone here can answer that. What is your priority? Some people love extra income and dont mind not having homemade food, home child care, etc...
    Some people say - its ok to have less money but I need my child to grow up in home and want to have my wife taking care of our home.

    Whats your preference and most importantly, what are you ready to give up. You and only you can tell that....
    Ek din sher banke jeene se behtar hai do din sher banke jiyo...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hello everyone.. i am confused between two girls for marriage.. please tell me...
    The first girl - she is average looking.. she has good education(B.Tech) and is working in MNC earning (5-6 lpa).
    The Second girl - She is very beautiful but she has done BA and is teacher (earning 10k per month), wants to be housewife. But the girl is very cheerful and i liked her a lot.

    I am confused as i am not able to decide which one to select for Arrange marriage. Both the girls have agreed. I am not able to make decision - service wali vs housewife. I am an average middle class person with decent salary. Service wife will have good cash flows to house but won't work in house at all. But our kids will have lots of money. So financial condition will be very good. Negative - We might have ego issues in future etc. etc. as it happens in all household.
    Housewife is also good but she will do nothing just make food which i don't want.. But life will be peaceful.. no fights.. i want that my wife also work (may not earn well but still kuch to earn kare)..
    career girl and homely girl are just a stupid classification of women..nothing more...
    it can not define a person..a so called "homely girl" can be full of ego and a so called "working girl" can be cool as a punch...
    decision is not that complicated...If I were you, I would have married the cooler of the two..irrespective of job...

  9. #9
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    Go with the "homely" girl. You already have doubts that you will have ego issues with the "career" girl, so if you marry her, these issues will definitely ensue. Plus, you must be a juvenile (mentality ) and have not seen the real world yet. Happy marriage, and I hope you don't get to see the real world coz it is little more complicated. The tragedy is the every mortal gets to see it after marriage.

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    SB Guru Major rv102938's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by madjaymad View Post
    You can do one thing to clear your dilemma... Go for a date with both of them(of course separately) with a stopwatch... Record actual time spent (say T1 & T2).... Assume the time spent in your mind without looking at your watch(Say RT1 & RT2).... choose the Girl whose RT/T ratio is less....
    isme bhi ek chhota Einstein chhupa nazar aata hai mujhe...ye bhi kalko jaake kisika gf/bf banega/gi to hume AA me ek aur query answer karni padegi....
    Ek din sher banke jeene se behtar hai do din sher banke jiyo...

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hello everyone.. i am confused between two girls for marriage.. please tell me...
    The first girl - she is average looking.. she has good education(B.Tech) and is working in MNC earning (5-6 lpa).
    The Second girl - She is very beautiful but she has done BA and is teacher (earning 10k per month), wants to be housewife. But the girl is very cheerful and i liked her a lot.

    I am confused as i am not able to decide which one to select for Arrange marriage. Both the girls have agreed. I am not able to make decision - service wali vs housewife. I am an average middle class person with decent salary. Service wife will have good cash flows to house but won't work in house at all. But our kids will have lots of money. So financial condition will be very good. Negative - We might have ego issues in future etc. etc. as it happens in all household.
    Housewife is also good but she will do nothing just make food which i don't want.. But life will be peaceful.. no fights.. i want that my wife also work (may not earn well but still kuch to earn kare)..
    Dude who told you that marrying a housewife will make life peaceful, what if she is a nagging type who just wants to fight.

    There are no set rules to marry, it all about compatibility in the end, frankly speaking in these age and times, it is better to have a wife who is working and contributing to the finances and for the ego learn to trust your wife, if you dont trust your wife even if she is a housewife, it will create more complications

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    Categorizing women into working or housewife won't tell you how she will turn out to be as a wife..! Both can be risky! :P understand what you are looking for as a life partner.. n choose that lady! and tell her your priorities and what you are expecting from her.. understand hers! This a decision that u will take for life time.. no alterations possible.. So choose once.. but choose wise!
    All the best!!

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    In short, go for mature understanding girl...and remember beauty without brain is nothing

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    don't marry either and try to have casual sex with both. best of both worlds. whichever gives better sex, you keep dating

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