My boyfriend went overseas for about half a year and he got to know a girl there. When he came back I noticed they were still keeping in touch. When I asked him he told me they weren't. I decided to snoop through his phone (yes I know i really shouldn't) and I saw him sending him pictures of his family, himself, pictures he sent to me as well. He also wished her on special occasions like Valentine's Day etc. every time we were quarreling, it seems he found it in him to still strike a conversation with her to keep in touch.

Now my boyfriend told me that he believes in drawing lines clearly and he forbade me from keeping in touch with my male friends. So seeing that he's crossing these lines made me uncomfortable. I asked him again if he felt that texting girl friends happy Valentine's Day etc is something that counts as crossing the line and if he ever texted one. He said yes it's crossing the line and he never did text a girl that. Before I could confront him with the evidence on his phone, he deleted those text messages and got angry when I told him i already saw them.

Even after I told him I was hurt by his actions and I wanted him to stay away from her, he still continued to reply her messages in group chats (because he says it's a group chat and not private) and he refuses to delete her on Facebook or truly cut off all contact because he says that she was a really good friend who didn't judge him.

So I guess after my really long story, I just want to know what do you guys think. Do you think he actually liked her for awhile and finds it hard to cut it off? How long will it take for him to actually say ok I'm going to delete her out of my life?

I have a really hard time getting over it because he has no answers for my questions. He tells me he never liked her, that she was just a good friend and he doesn't know why he deleted those text messages or why he lied about keeping in touch with her when he could have told me straight. I just don't get it. How do I get over it? Did he or did he not feel a hint of attraction for her?