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Thread: I've had multiple failures in life

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    Thumbs down I've had multiple failures in life

    Hi mam hello everyone..I m a regular reader of ur forum n I really appreciate ur work.
    Dears I m 28 year old male..mam I m really so so so disappointed in life.my life is full of only downs downs n downs.wen I was 12 yr old,I lost my dad,n after a few years jab main aise taise sambhal raha tha dat time lost my uncle cum frnd again I was full depressed I m telling u my problem in short.plz bare me.i failed in 12,again failed in diploma..In every semester of diploma one or 2 subjects i used to fail . anyhow completed my diploma n went to a metro city.there I tried for almost 6 months to get the job but once again failed..did some software courses by spending lot of money but al this gone waste,didn't got job so came back to my native..In my native got management seat for engineering to pursue higher studies.i thought it ll help me to get the job but once again I failed...I didn't hold grip on studies after 6 months gap between diploma n engineering.so I quited engineering..huhh.den I started a business but again due to less knowledge n competition I didn't make it out.i lost interest in dat business..n by den I tried almost 5-6 businesses but nothing is working. My dad was a Dr.my brother is a Dr..but I m unemployed, no work,no earnings at all.its killing me.plz help me out everyone.what should I do?kya meri kismat hi kharab hai?feeling to commit suicide but wen I see my mom's face I give up. plz plz plz help..

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Hmmm...yes, one can understand that you would be feeling demoralised and dejected, but that could be because you have not really tried to identify your strengths and interests but just gone along with any course that came your way, without too much success. The thing is, at this juncture, to find out what's available in the job market and go for it. You are qualified enough to find something or the other and then its up to you to make a success of it. You really have to persevere and not keep quitting, because finally its you who has to do it!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hi mam hello everyone..I m a regular reader of ur forum n I really appreciate ur work.
    Dears I m 28 year old male..mam I m really so so so disappointed in life.my life is full of only downs downs n downs.wen I was 12 yr old,I lost my dad,n after a few years jab main aise taise sambhal raha tha dat time lost my uncle cum frnd again I was full depressed I m telling u my problem in short.plz bare me.i failed in 12,again failed in diploma..In every semester of diploma one or 2 subjects i used to fail . anyhow completed my diploma n went to a metro city.there I tried for almost 6 months to get the job but once again failed..did some software courses by spending lot of money but al this gone waste,didn't got job so came back to my native..In my native got management seat for engineering to pursue higher studies.i thought it ll help me to get the job but once again I failed...I didn't hold grip on studies after 6 months gap between diploma n engineering.so I quited engineering..huhh.den I started a business but again due to less knowledge n competition I didn't make it out.i lost interest in dat business..n by den I tried almost 5-6 businesses but nothing is working. My dad was a Dr.my brother is a Dr..but I m unemployed, no work,no earnings at all.its killing me.plz help me out everyone.what should I do?kya meri kismat hi kharab hai?feeling to commit suicide but wen I see my mom's face I give up. plz plz plz help..
    good thing you have decided not to commit suicide...
    from your words it seems that you haven't done anything with whole heart...
    quitting is not the solution...

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    Try try try again and you will succeed if you are learning any lessons at each failure, If you are not learning, then I think there is a kismat issue.
    You never know what you can become ..

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    your whole post doesnt seem right. let me tell you why...

    1) losing your dad and uncle - how did you fail there? unless you were responsible for their death, thats not your failure.

    2) were you trying to find the job. if yes, then did you talk to other people on what they did to get the job? did you have them conduct mock interviews and check how you fare? basically, have you "really" tried? you tried for 6 months which included the time you did courses. i would not call that failure. i know friends who have a successful career, and have tried more than 6 months to find a job.

    3) what you mean you lost interest? did you have interest in the first place. businesses take many years to succeed. initial years are always losses. did you do enough groundwork before starting business, observing what others did. working for free, as a apprentice at some place to learn the skills? doesnt look like from your query. same goes for 5-6 businesses.

    so in short, you are just doing things to fail. and not doing a single thing in the right way. just focus and do things right, and you should succeed. i bet even while committing suicide, you will do it haphazardly and fail at that...
    Ek din sher banke jeene se behtar hai do din sher banke jiyo...

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    This is the low of your life, it can't get any worse. Believe me, now onwards, it can only get better.

    Just wake your senses, and pour your heart and focus on a venture, and I am sure, you will be all fine.

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    You could have said that all these disappointments in life made me stronger and shaped me to be resilient and prepared me for success.... The problem is your victim mentality... Obama had no dad... her mom used to work as servant and today he is the president of USA... dad dying is an excuse .... uncle come friend dying is a bigger excuse... You could have studied hard but you were failing in diploma... I think if your dad and uncle would have been alive ... you won't be better because you would find an excuse to fail even then.. Yes dad dying would have made you over sensitive but it is you who have shaped your mind to find excuses...
    Secondly you are not being honest with yourself.... Just sit in a calm place one night and note down your mistakes honestly and then positively reflect on your mistakes... do it on draft on your mail account and just think you are not going to show or discuss it with anyone... You have experience of failing in 5 to 6 businesses and you have experience of failing in Engineering and diploma.... You have a wide experience and knowledge of what works and what does not work... You know what are your strengths and weaknesses...
    Just write what were your weakness because of which you failed in each business... don't think of excuses like I didn't have money and somebody did fraud... write things like I selected a wrong product or business... I did not do a market research... I could not do a market research because of my that inability ..... Write who told you to start that business... Do you still trust him/her for her suggestions?
    Write why you used to fail in diploma exams in real? The subjects were very boring... you were more interested in fun with friends... You were always thinking about bad circumstances in past and ruining the future...
    After writing all these find your weaknesses among these reasons and reflections...
    Now you have something to work on... whatever decisions you take in future just keep in mind your weaknesses.... Keep in mind that mistake done once is a mistake but when you do it twice its your decision and its becomes your habit.
    Remember... always concentrate on building skills... Skills make you valuable rather than degrees and diplomas... skills will land you good jobs and profit in business rather than pieces of paper called degrees and diplomas... Even if someone hires you for degree or diploma ... he/she will fire you if you don't have skills...
    After you have reflected on your life and your mistakes...
    Be honest with yourself and think what you really like to be in future... anything which you like and do day in day out except of making excuses... it might be games... and after you find that thing just start your journey towards it with passion... Start by finding a related job to get skills ... don't concentrate on money but making your skills... work for free... and then when you start doing it yourself stick to it for 5 years at least... burn all your ships to go back....

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    SB Guru Major rosalie's Avatar
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    Ok...u lack drive and confidence and u give up easily.
    u need to man urself put ur focus on what u really want to do. If it's a business then do some market research before u take anything...and get some self help book read it...


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    yeah.......... Your problem is a brain teaser.

    Unemployed... Failure ... Failure.. Failure.. Unemployed Failure..

    Look "even if you fall on your face, its still called moving forward.."

    stopping however on the other hand is failure.

    Try to learn business... before starting one. Try to be deserving... before looking for a job. If you do not deserve a good Job how will you get one. Try getting good coaching... prepare well for govt job exams. But i think it will be too hard for you since you failed every year of your education. So koi "kaam dhanda hi seekh lo". Your bro is a doctor cant he help you starting a chemist shop/ or starting any business related to medical profession.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hi mam hello everyone..I m a regular reader of ur forum n I really appreciate ur work.
    Dears I m 28 year old male..mam I m really so so so disappointed in life.my life is full of only downs downs n downs.wen I was 12 yr old,I lost my dad,n after a few years jab main aise taise sambhal raha tha dat time lost my uncle cum frnd again I was full depressed I m telling u my problem in short.plz bare me.i failed in 12,again failed in diploma..In every semester of diploma one or 2 subjects i used to fail . anyhow completed my diploma n went to a metro city.there I tried for almost 6 months to get the job but once again failed..did some software courses by spending lot of money but al this gone waste,didn't got job so came back to my native..In my native got management seat for engineering to pursue higher studies.i thought it ll help me to get the job but once again I failed...I didn't hold grip on studies after 6 months gap between diploma n engineering.so I quited engineering..huhh.den I started a business but again due to less knowledge n competition I didn't make it out.i lost interest in dat business..n by den I tried almost 5-6 businesses but nothing is working. My dad was a Dr.my brother is a Dr..but I m unemployed, no work,no earnings at all.its killing me.plz help me out everyone.what should I do?kya meri kismat hi kharab hai?feeling to commit suicide but wen I see my mom's face I give up. plz plz plz help..
    Zindagi ki yehi reet hai
    Haar ke baad hi jeet hai
    Zindagi ki yehi reet hai
    Haar ke baaz hi jeet hai

    Thode aansu hai, thodi hasi
    Aaj gham hai to kal hai khushi
    Zindagi ki yehi reet hai
    Haar ke baad hi jeet hai
    Thode aansu hai, thodi hasi
    Aaj gham hai to kal hai khushi

    Bro no one's is successful and nothing like success comes to you in platter. i must say u r patient enough to handle ur failures. but from them we have to learn and move forward. Its life n we have to live it to fullest. what i cud understand frm ur query that u r not into studies and walked mile with no goal thinking gathering degrees can get u job without putting heart in it. wen tht didnt work u did busines tht too u failed. for business u hv to calculate many parameters. my suggestion wud be plan things and then execute and weigh ur options. one more thing suicide is attempted by cowards and u hv courage as u faced so many things. be brave and faith in lord.
    Dilon mein tum apni betaabiyan leke chal rahe ho toh zinda ho tum, nazar mein khwabon ki bijliyan leke chal rahe ho toh zinda ho tum ... hawa ke jhokon ke jaise aazad rehno seekho, tum ek dariya ke jaise lehron mein behna seekho ... har ek lamhe se tum milo khole apni baahen, har ek pal ek naya samha dekhe yeh nigaahen ... joh apni aankhon mein hairaaniyan leke chal rahe ho toh zinda ho tum, dilon mein tum apni betaabiyan leke chal rahe ho toh zinda ho tum..

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hi mam hello everyone.....plz plz help..
    Dear friend, I was also thinking to committee suicide. Then i found my interest in a field. I spent my 4-5 years to learn it. That was the worst time of my life. But after specialization in that skill, but i was not confident about good salary, good life etc. Then again i changed my lane and gone other field. I have done it 2-3 times. Now i am satisfied with my life.

    Now i want to going beyond, because before i complete learning period, my friends and relatives left me behind. They become more successful.

    The life is a fight man. You have to fight everyday. Never give-up. LET PASS THIS TIME.

    you don't need to prove any thing to anybody. You are special if you are not following what other are doing.

  12. #12

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    Quote Originally Posted by mysticmantra View Post
    Zindagi ki yehi reet haiHaar ke baad hi jeet haiZindagi ki yehi reet haiHaar ke baaz hi jeet haiThode aansu hai, thodi hasiAaj gham hai to kal hai khushiZindagi ki yehi reet haiHaar ke baad hi jeet haiThode aansu hai, thodi hasiAaj gham hai to kal hai khushi Bro no one's is successful and nothing like success comes to you in platter. i must say u r patient enough to handle ur failures. but from them we have to learn and move forward. Its life n we have to live it to fullest. what i cud understand frm ur query that u r not into studies and walked mile with no goal thinking gathering degrees can get u job without putting heart in it. wen tht didnt work u did busines tht too u failed. for business u hv to calculate many parameters. my suggestion wud be plan things and then execute and weigh ur options. one more thing suicide is attempted by cowards and u hv courage as u faced so many things. be brave and faith in lord. Dilon mein tum apni betaabiyan leke chal rahe ho toh zinda ho tum, nazar mein khwabon ki bijliyan leke chal rahe ho toh zinda ho tum ... hawa ke jhokon ke jaise aazad rehno seekho, tum ek dariya ke jaise lehron mein behna seekho ... har ek lamhe se tum milo khole apni baahen, har ek pal ek naya samha dekhe yeh nigaahen ... joh apni aankhon mein hairaaniyan leke chal rahe ho toh zinda ho tum, dilon mein tum apni betaabiyan leke chal rahe ho toh zinda ho tum..
    Wonderful line bro.This song remind of all my struggle in past 28 years. Thanks for the share dear.

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    I think rather than taking advice from anonymous people like us in the forum.. talk to someone whom you feel close with.. He may be your brother ,some friend or some family member.
    May be you feel hestitation in sharing your real feelings & problems to them.. Just be a bit brave & take a small step..
    If you cannot talk to them - just get the print of your question you posted here & show them..
    believe me you may think it as a very unrealistic thing but just try it once.. & see you will feel your all problem disappears!!!!

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    I think rather than taking advice from anonymous people like us in the forum.. talk to someone whom you feel close with.. He may be your brother ,some friend or some family member.
    May be you feel hestitation in sharing your real feelings & problems to them.. Just be a bit brave & take a small step..
    If you cannot talk to them - just get the print of your question you posted here & show them..
    believe me you may think it as a very unrealistic thing but just try it once.. & see you will feel your all problem disappears!!!!

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    Hope for better.....

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