Do looks really matter?

[Unregistered]

I am 26 year old attractive looking female
Recently got engaged to an average looking guy who is settled in America and
Belongs to a good family.
He is good in nature and respect me alot.
Everything is just good expect that his looks sometimes bother me while video calling.
I know i should have thought about it earlier but now can't fo back in time and breaking this relationship is not an option.
Everything is perfect expect the average looks.
Am I thinking too much? How can i overcome this feeling?

[Preeto Maam]

Listen, that's an issue that you will have to resolve with yourself. If he's a nice, loving and loveable guy and you feel that you can live a happy life with him and even grow to like his looks, then its all right. But if its a feeling of real disgust that you have when you think of him, then there may be a problem.
You have to see what feeling he evokes in you and then take it ahead. Looks are purely subjective in any case....the most ordinary person may be beautiful to someone and vice versa as well.

[NavelFanatic]

Sometimes I feel like writing a lot to help some people out. And then there are people like you. He loves you, he respects you but he is average looking and that is bothering you. You are really a very disgusting and ugly person within, no matter how good looking you are. You don't deserve a damn. And you really want us all to help you figure this out. Sick.

[ariesgirl]

If all the good things about him doesn't move your heart, you will keep complaining about his looks all your life.. This will mess up your whole married life.. At least this guy deserves a better life and a partner who loves him unconditionally... Seems like you accepted this proposal only because he is based in US.. So that's the only thing you love about him... Breaking off the engagement is still an option.. It's not too late... Save this guy.. He deserves a chance to find his true love...

[o00]

If the fact that you find the way he looks not 'so good' bothers you, then yes the looks do matter. Now we dont know if you should actually be worried or not. We don't even know if you look good or not. You need to grow up and shed the shallow mentality. If you are beautiful, people are gonna say you accepted his proposal just for getting into USA. See you are screwed now.

[rv102938]

from your first 2 stmts, i i thought you are a pompous b*tch. rest of the text did not change my stance much, except the fact that you are acknowledging your problem. acknowledging that there is an issue improves the chances of resolving the issue.

yes, you should give it time and continue to be with him. tell him that you like him and then you would like to improve his physical looks. see how he reacts. it can be a good exercise for you to groom him physically. even bad looking people can be made better with subtle changes. look at so many models.

one other thing, over time you will learn to look at some of his other aspects, maybe he has some other things that you will like (no pun intended).

[mumbaiplayer]

I suggest moving to America with him, where there are plenty of Hollywood good looking white men for you to sleep with while this average looking Indian man pays your expenses.

[Sweet Mimi]

my dear looks doesnt matter... as you said he isnt bad looking just an average looking guy. believe me having someone good looking is something you think only at start... with time as u get married u wont even bother if you are with a good looking guy. its not that everyday you will remember he is good looking.. life will be all about other things. you will regret if you refuse a person taking care of you for a person who is selfish and knows that he is good looking.. has plenty of ego. flirt or let girls flirt because he attracts girls. or even cheat on you.... dont do this.. this guy never chose to be an average person... why u punishing him for that. i understand your expectation ut believe me as you will grow mature you will know that looks was never so important! my personal view... better a bad looking guy who is loyal than a good looking guy like a dog after all kind of women!

[Lisbonstar28]

I am 26 year old attractive looking female
Recently got engaged to an average looking guy who is settled in America and
Belongs to a good family.
He is good in nature and respect me alot.
Everything is just good expect that his looks sometimes bother me while video calling.
I know i should have thought about it earlier but now can't fo back in time and breaking this relationship is not an option.
Everything is perfect expect the average looks.
Am I thinking too much? How can i overcome this feeling?

Seems like you are just getting cold feet. Looks are important there has to be some degree of physical attraction, the vibrations have to be there, but if you've got a good rapport and other chemistries going on then that kind of balances the scales as well. Just get to know him a bit better for now

[confused_butterfly]

Yes and no.... but your problem is not if looks matter or not. You need to be prepared for what comes next, which is marriage! If you can't be romatically involved with this person then marrying him his wrong because you can not give him what he deserves. Engagement is a commitment but your's is arranged. In this case, if things don't work out, it is best to move on than to remain in a relationship that hasn't really formed and transform into to something as serious as marriage.

[Ralph Lauren]

Looks fade as you keep growing old! What after that? Lol will you still find it disgusting judgmental ***ch .Its the personality that counts in the long run..get a reality check..its always the good looking guys who cheat bcuz they think they can get any chick but an average or a below average guy won't wander about and will spend his life trying to make you happy to fill up the deficit about his own looks and that he knows he'll never find someone that easy

[prabhendu]

I am 26 year old attractive looking female
Recently got engaged to an average looking guy who is settled in America and
Belongs to a good family.
He is good in nature and respect me alot.
Everything is just good expect that his looks sometimes bother me while video calling.
I know i should have thought about it earlier but now can't fo back in time and breaking this relationship is not an option.
Everything is perfect expect the average looks.
Am I thinking too much? How can i overcome this feeling?

I am afraid, I am judging you a lot at this moment...
i feel you chose this guy, just because of his job in US...
now about your dilemma...
when you say average, then yes you are overthinking...
not every one is a model..every person is unique...you could focus on his other qualities...
but if he is ugly, then he is ugly...you can always say if a guy is passable or downright ugly...
if breaking relationship is not an option, then please remain as "practical" as you are..and get married...there are many attractive female married to "average" looking guys settled in abroad...