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Thread: Is she the 'right one'?

  1. #1
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    Default Is she the 'right one'?

    Hello Maam

    I am a single male and looking for relationship advice. I am recently talking to a girl on a matrimonial website for marriage. I am planning a trip to India and will meet her in the coming month or 2 for the first time.

    She is good looking, talented and has all possible qualities. But i am confused what to look for in a partner. Never had a girlfriend in my life so I am not sure what sort of things to look for in your partner.

    How to decide if she is the one for me. My family leaves the final decision on me everytime and I am not even sure myself what to look for in a person! Everyone seems nice and gentle in the beginning but then I have heard so many fights and divorces of friends and people around happening that I am scared as to how to even select your partner whom you are going to spend the rest of your life with.

    Please advice. thanks

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Hi! Well, you really have to take the first step first and meet her, get to know her and see how she makes you feel. See, there are never any guarantees that a relationship will last forever or that you will be happy forever with the partner that you choose, but one makes one's choice based on shared values and interests and goals in life- and most importantly, how you make each other feel about yourselves. Is it a happy, positive feeling that you get when you are with her or does she make you feel insignificant and lacking. heed to these and other instinctive pointers and hopefully you should be able to make the right choice.

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    SB Guru Major rv102938's Avatar
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    if you dont know what to look for, then marriage for you will be a flip of coin. you are doomed anyways, dont think anything that we tell you is going to save you...
    Ek din sher banke jeene se behtar hai do din sher banke jiyo...

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    « rahmaniac » Lieutenant-Colonel ariesgirl's Avatar
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    Don't worry... Just meet her, talk to her and see if she gives you that kinda feeling people talk about... And talk to her more these days,till you come at least.. You can at least be sure by then... And when you meet her,you will know your final decision too.. Hope everything goes well.
    Give people roses while they can still smell them. . .

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hello Maam

    I am a single male and looking for relationship advice. I am recently talking to a girl on a matrimonial website for marriage. I am planning a trip to India and will meet her in the coming month or 2 for the first time.

    She is good looking, talented and has all possible qualities. But i am confused what to look for in a partner. Never had a girlfriend in my life so I am not sure what sort of things to look for in your partner.

    How to decide if she is the one for me. My family leaves the final decision on me everytime and I am not even sure myself what to look for in a person! Everyone seems nice and gentle in the beginning but then I have heard so many fights and divorces of friends and people around happening that I am scared as to how to even select your partner whom you are going to spend the rest of your life with.

    Please advice. thanks
    that would have to be a leap of faith.
    initially everyone is nice...and you never know what could happen..
    also there must be bad cases, but the result is not bad every time ...

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    The biggest decision in one’s life is to choose a life partner. So, who was that Idiot who said – Marriages are made in Heaven? Most people, even in this age have arranged marriages. A short-list is typically through a Matrimonial site, collaboration through the Social Media, a couple of face-to-face meetings in a Coffee Shop and then the parents take over.

    Communication is key in understanding preferences and assessing expectations. Compatibility as a screening factor (say 60%) is required although some other idiot said – Opposites attract. We address the pain areas of communication and test compatibility by providing a platform for such prospective brides and grooms. It would also be psychometric to assess honesty and vulnerabilities. The online personality profile is designed to assess a prospective groom / bride in terms of their proclivities under the following categories.


    • Family Ties

    • Health

    • Religious Beliefs and the Level of devotion
    • Preferences and Habits
    • Romantic Inclinations
    • Trust Issues
    • Baggage – Previous Relationships
    • Career – Importance and Inclination
    • Risk Seeking abilities
    • Relocation / Migration
    • Children – When and how many
    • Health of Siblings and Support after marriage
    • Finances / Commitments
    • Hobbies and Activities
    • Upbringing – Incidents
    • Aspirations – Career and Personal goals
    • Expectations – From Partner
    • The Wedding itself


    If you are both keen to proceed further, please PM me. It does not cost anything.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hello Maam

    I am a single male and looking for relationship advice. I am recently talking to a girl on a matrimonial website for marriage. I am planning a trip to India and will meet her in the coming month or 2 for the first time.

    She is good looking, talented and has all possible qualities. But i am confused what to look for in a partner. Never had a girlfriend in my life so I am not sure what sort of things to look for in your partner.

    How to decide if she is the one for me. My family leaves the final decision on me everytime and I am not even sure myself what to look for in a person! Everyone seems nice and gentle in the beginning but then I have heard so many fights and divorces of friends and people around happening that I am scared as to how to even select your partner whom you are going to spend the rest of your life with.

    Please advice. thanks
    First of all, chill, sit back, have cold water and relax........its all natural, like you have a peaceful life, your goals, family life, friendships, homely habits, enjoyments etc etc...similarly she has all of them too. To look for in a partner there are all logical points like career choices, family preferences, food habits and all those real world things that can be seen or felt first hand. Other than that honesty, loyalty etc etc cant be seen and you can never be sure about any ANY person in the world, so be sure of real world and logical qualities and then proceed, having GF or not having GF is not a experience thing or a problem, it was your preference, your choice, man and woman are naturally inclined towards each other, just make sure that she equally reciprocates and asks you all those preferences too.

  8. #8
    ~ cavalier ~ ♀ ☣ )o( ⌆ Lieutenant-Colonel Lisbonstar28's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hello Maam

    I am a single male and looking for relationship advice. I am recently talking to a girl on a matrimonial website for marriage. I am planning a trip to India and will meet her in the coming month or 2 for the first time.

    She is good looking, talented and has all possible qualities. But i am confused what to look for in a partner. Never had a girlfriend in my life so I am not sure what sort of things to look for in your partner.

    How to decide if she is the one for me. My family leaves the final decision on me everytime and I am not even sure myself what to look for in a person! Everyone seems nice and gentle in the beginning but then I have heard so many fights and divorces of friends and people around happening that I am scared as to how to even select your partner whom you are going to spend the rest of your life with.

    Please advice. thanks

    If the final decision is left to you then it’s only fair that the first decision be so too. I wouldn’t opt for arranged if i were you, you don’t seem the type neither do you seem to know your wants in a future partner. You could do with choosing your own, mingling, socialising etc until you find mrs perfect. But like every marriage, what you get is about how much you put in. Nothing comes on a plate, and if it does come on a plate, it’s not worth the take because that wouldn’t be genuine.
    So may it be

  9. #9
    SB Wizard Captain o00's Avatar
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    It will just feel right when it is right.
    You never know what you can become ..

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    does she shares common interests with you ? like what are her views on friendship, relationships, love and feelings. See If she has any past regarding relationships? If yes, has she moved on? what are her plans for future. What does she want from a relationship... or what are her expectations from a life partner..
    What are her views on family planning.. you can ask major questions on any type. Just break the ice with the first basic question.. what are her hobbies?

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