its difficult to make decisions in present without knowing what will happen in future. but irrespective of that, you have to take your best judgement.
in your case, i believe that your bf's line of thinking is what you should go with. the negative repercussions of your brother knowing later far outweigh the advantages of keeping him in the dark. in other words, you should be ready to live with the risks of him telling your family now, even if that means your relationship does not end up in marriage and you have to be embarrassed. just make up your mind and go with the decision. all the best.
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