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Thread: Do fat girls not deserve to be loved?

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    Default Do fat girls not deserve to be loved?

    Hii,

    I am a 26 independent girl who is in search for the RIGHT ONE. I am on the fatter side so I just want to know is it really a sin to be fat ? Is it ok for girls who are beautiful and slim deserve to be loved despite how their behavior is?

    Doesn't a fat girl just deserve one chance to be known ??

  2. #2
    Moderator Lieutenant General Preeto Maam's Avatar
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    Everyone deserves to be loved and that's the truth! Don't let yourself be body shamed into feeling that your weight is hampering your chances of love. There is all kinds of beauty in the world, and there's something beautiful is everyone.
    So, yes, you certainly deserve love. And weight has nothing to do with it!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hii,

    I am a 26 independent girl who is in search for the RIGHT ONE. I am on the fatter side so I just want to know is it really a sin to be fat ? Is it ok for girls who are beautiful and slim deserve to be loved despite how their behavior is?

    Doesn't a fat girl just deserve one chance to be known ??
    ========================
    Unfortunately that's the truth. There are various perceptions to it. There are people who want to be liked and loved by many people so they work hard on their bodies to look attractive and this way they get to choose rather than vice versa (that doesn't mean fuller people can't but most of the times their choice doesn't work).


    there are people who are happy with their bodies and don't care about what world thinks. If someone will choose them, they will do as they are. Now coming back to your concern, its human tendency that the first step towards attraction is someone or something should be visually appealing. It goes for all whether you are choosing a partner, a dress, a phone or any materialistic thing for that matter. I know I'd be getting a bashing from other members but that is the truth. You can't deny that. For argument purpose: will you marry a rickshaw puller who by looks is not appealing but has a good heart?


    We are coded to choose from options. Take an example of arranged marriage. Parents look for a girl who is fair, whose limbs are perfect should have a voice of nightingale should not have a scar on the face etc etc.


    Hence, you want to choose or you want to be chosen is upto you. (see you have options here too ;P ). Make a choice and stick to it.
    Last edited by oceanseleven80; 21-02-2017 at 06:46 PM.

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    Its not like Fat girls don't deserve to be loved. But the ugly truth is, if there are 5 fat girls and 1 slim girl standing in a bus stop and a guy is watching, he'll pick the slim one. So its just the attraction part where you might or might not score. I'm gonna be honest to you, your best chance at getting a relationship is with a guy friend i.e. someone you know.

    But don't worry thats not the only option, there are other ways to look attractive, and its not just the physical features. You should have a personality which is magnetic or have a crazy sense of humor or a natural flirt. You gotta have something to give, if you're just a "good person", its just plain boring. You gotta have a winning personality, like you dont give a shit about you being fat and all.

    There's a Youtube comedian named Mallika Dua, search for her on Youtube/Google, she might look fat but she's really funny and I really find that sexy. I'm a fan.
    I'm in love with your body
    I'm in love with the Shape of You



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    SB Guru Major rv102938's Avatar
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    No, its not a sin. But on the other hand, its also not about the external beauty. There are a lot of subconscious things that are related to good health. Healthiness is often tied to confidence, self-control, very loosely wealth whereas if you are fat, then subconsciously, the mind attaches you with some negative traits like lack of self-control, etc. I am not saying this out of the blue, I have read some research papers on this. So dont blow this out of proportion and defend fatness.

    Irrespective of that fatness is an health issue that can cause many problems in the future. Try eating less and jogging for a start. Once you are comfortable, you can go for yoga. But self-discipline is important.
    Ek din sher banke jeene se behtar hai do din sher banke jiyo...

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    « rahmaniac » Lieutenant-Colonel ariesgirl's Avatar
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    To be brutally honest, nobody cares about an average looking girl.. Especially when she is fat or dark... I may be slammed for this.. But still it's the truth... People may laugh with you, be friends with you, praise you for your skills, helping nature etc... but nobody would want to have a relationship with someone like this... Most people get attracted to beauty first , like it's the physical attraction that catches attention first (again everyone's definition of beauty depends and is perspective... If someone does see it, you are lucky) Also, people who usually say that looks doesn't matter at all and that it's the character that matters are the same hypocrites who look for a tall, slim and beautiful girl for their son... You might be gem of a person, but nobody cares when it comes to marriage or relationship... People always prefer a trophy that they can show off to others... Same is the thing that happens with arranged marriages... The guy's family always prefer the better looking girl even if the other one is as successful as the first one (even if their son is a total mismatch to the beautiful girl)... The sooner you realise these facts, the better you can get hold of your life... And you shouldn't make a boyfriend just for the sake of it or just because everyone else has.. If you try to, you probably will have to compromise a lot.. Never settle for anything less...
    While you try to digest all these, you have to equally realise the fact that being fat is definitely an instant turn off to most people.. But being healthy is something most important and beneficial for no one but you!! Easy to say, my body my rules and stuffs like these.. But trust me, being fit feels the best.. Don't do it for others.. Do it for yourself... Once you start losing weight, you will realise the benefits, it will have a huge impact on your life.. It will only do you good.. If you are determined to do it, you can definitely do it..
    So instead of crying over your weight and not finding a partner, try to work on your weak points.. Work on your body and make it healthy.. Your body is your wealth, take care of it... It's the best thing you can do to yourself... Weight is not something one is stuck with unlike colour or height...


    PS: this comes from another girl who was once bullied for being on the heavier side even though i was much taller than even boys of my age and I had a large frame. Those idiots still called me fat. So I know exactly how you feel. I have seen this enough.


    Also, my cousin's wife is almost two times his weight and it was a love marriage.. She was his long time friend.. She still continues to gain weight and he continues to ask her to lose weight..


    Give people roses while they can still smell them. . .

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    It is what it is, that is the reality of the world to some extent, outer beauty matters to a greater extent than the inner beauty. Learn to live with it. Sometimes the girl is not as good looking but is ultra rich and in those cases, handsome guys marry them. Sorry for the harsh tone but I don't want you to live in denial. You will find the right one some day who might be willing to compromise or is also a bit fat or not as "good looking" externally due to some other reason. Like you said, the internal beauty only should matter and there should be no issues while saying "yes" for such guy when you find one.
    You never know what you can become ..

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    If a guy is fat and ugly, he is fat and ugly. Full stop!
    If a girl is fat and ugly, look how beautiful she is from the inside!

    #bullshitfeminism

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    Hi dear, I have been on all dimensions possible for my structure, fat, thin, fit, and now a little wide (but not chubby)
    All i can tell you, is no matter if its a guy or a girl, whatever skin tone, or vital stats they may have,
    ALL that matters is how much you love AND respect yourself. Believe in your activities.. thin down only if its for your personal happiness, or just don't give a ****.

    Believe me, the drive for happiness needs to be from within, as though time changes everything but a positive persona will take you places... it will get you the people who like YOU.
    Your changed persona will get you a changed company.. may be the 'right one' will walk in from that very bunch.
    good luck and stay happy!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hii,

    I am a 26 independent girl who is in search for the RIGHT ONE. I am on the fatter side so I just want to know is it really a sin to be fat ? Is it ok for girls who are beautiful and slim deserve to be loved despite how their behavior is?

    Doesn't a fat girl just deserve one chance to be known ??
    who says so.beauty lies in beholder's eye.maybe ur yet to meet ur mr.right.

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    SB Addict mysticmantra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ariesgirl View Post
    To be brutally honest, nobody cares about an average looking girl.. Especially when she is fat or dark... I may be slammed for this.. But still it's the truth... People may laugh with you, be friends with you, praise you for your skills, helping nature etc... but nobody would want to have a relationship with someone like this... Most people get attracted to beauty first , like it's the physical attraction that catches attention first (again everyone's definition of beauty depends and is perspective... If someone does see it, you are lucky) Also, people who usually say that looks doesn't matter at all and that it's the character that matters are the same hypocrites who look for a tall, slim and beautiful girl for their son... You might be gem of a person, but nobody cares when it comes to marriage or relationship... People always prefer a trophy that they can show off to others... Same is the thing that happens with arranged marriages... The guy's family always prefer the better looking girl even if the other one is as successful as the first one (even if their son is a total mismatch to the beautiful girl)... The sooner you realise these facts, the better you can get hold of your life... And you shouldn't make a boyfriend just for the sake of it or just because everyone else has.. If you try to, you probably will have to compromise a lot.. Never settle for anything less...
    While you try to digest all these, you have to equally realise the fact that being fat is definitely an instant turn off to most people.. But being healthy is something most important and beneficial for no one but you!! Easy to say, my body my rules and stuffs like these.. But trust me, being fit feels the best.. Don't do it for others.. Do it for yourself... Once you start losing weight, you will realise the benefits, it will have a huge impact on your life.. It will only do you good.. If you are determined to do it, you can definitely do it..
    So instead of crying over your weight and not finding a partner, try to work on your weak points.. Work on your body and make it healthy.. Your body is your wealth, take care of it... It's the best thing you can do to yourself... Weight is not something one is stuck with unlike colour or height...


    PS: this comes from another girl who was once bullied for being on the heavier side even though i was much taller than even boys of my age and I had a large frame. Those idiots still called me fat. So I know exactly how you feel. I have seen this enough.


    Also, my cousin's wife is almost two times his weight and it was a love marriage.. She was his long time friend.. She still continues to gain weight and he continues to ask her to lose weight..


    its not true. i hv seen so many beautiful gals but wen they talk u think y did u open ur mouth. they are utterly dumb. they u feel hitting ur head on brick wall. contrast intelligent gals r so sexy. u feel like u hv lot to learn n catch up.

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    To human brain everything is a tell (or a sign). Our five senses are designed that way. They gather information so that we can appropriately react and/or minimize risks. It's a normal human tendency and we all do it.

    To say you don't is to say that you seek contact with those forces which lead to a refusal of limitations of ordinary social life. An experience that surpasses and upsets the order of material life. However, you wouldn't be asking this question if you were any different. So whether you like it or not we all are predisposed to judge by physical appearance.

    For a moment let's say you had a property that you wanted to sell. A house, for instance, in a decent neighborhood but one that is poorly maintained. Any buyer that comes forward will instantly figure in additional costs and/or other risks. And not everyone's willing to spend or assume such risks, even if you offered a substantial discount.

    Now imagine human body as a property that you have loaned from the creator for this life. If you treated your body as temple, you will feed it well, cleanse, exercise, learn, etc to lead a healthy and fulfilling life. But a lot of people stick to what's essential or what's important to them. Keeping fit is therefore a sign that you are committed to taking good care of your body. And this is reassuring to the beholder because he see results of your accumulated actions that speak way louder than anything nice you have to say in the moment. After all, we are just sum of our actions.

    Please bear in mind this is not about things we cannot control such as height or any form of disability. Obesity is controllable for most part, yet if someone's fat, it suggests:

    (i) he's a slob
    (ii) there's a medical reason why he can't lose weight
    (iii) he doesn't have time

    All these cases pose some sort of risk to a partner and needless to say not everyone's is ready to take them on. Obviously we don't think this deep anymore. It's more of an involuntary response now, almost without any conscious intervention.

    And this is not just an obstacle to finding a suitable mate but also at work places or any place where commitment matters. How many 26 January parades have your seen with fat army men marching down Rajpath? So having healthy habits is more important than we'd like to admit.

    Just to be clear I'm not saying you cannot find love, but there are fewer takers so you will have to work hard on aspects you are good at to compensate for those you are not. It may seem unfair but that's the way it is, and it must be accepted, however undesirable.

    Good luck.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Hii,

    I am a 26 independent girl who is in search for the RIGHT ONE. I am on the fatter side so I just want to know is it really a sin to be fat ? Is it ok for girls who are beautiful and slim deserve to be loved despite how their behavior is?

    Doesn't a fat girl just deserve one chance to be known ??
    Course its not a sin but by human nature there is a process to unconditional love which starts off with infatuation, attraction then devotion. Generally speaking the attraction sparks have to be there initially before we can grapple each others behaviours (my belief). Each to their own cup of tea though i guess? Don't mean to be shallow but i believe slim fit people deserve a lot of respect because they set the healthy standard and inspire others to stay healthy. Unless you have a medical condition, being overweight shows that you don't care about yourself, why would someone want to be with such a person?.
    So may it be

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    DIVIDED WE FALL !! Brigadier General adirocksit's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lisbonstar28 View Post
    Course its not a sin but by human nature there is a process to unconditional love which starts off with infatuation, attraction then devotion. Generally speaking the attraction sparks have to be there initially before we can grapple each others behaviours (my belief). Each to their own cup of tea though i guess? Don't mean to be shallow but i believe slim fit people deserve a lot of respect because they set the healthy standard and inspire others to stay healthy. Unless you have a medical condition, being overweight shows that you don't care about yourself, why would someone want to be with such a person?.

    What about people who are fat but actually are in the process of loosing weight?...I mean you'd look fat for many months even when you're trying to get back in shape....

    Also what about people who are slim but not really fit?....Like so slim that you can hang them in your wardrobe....

    Your theory don't work.....
    I'm in love with your body
    I'm in love with the Shape of You



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    dont worry u will get a perfact one

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