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Thread: Loss of faith in wife

  1. #1
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    Default Loss of faith in wife

    Dear Preeto mam,
    I am a 30 years old male(hindu) married for 1.5 years. I got married to my wife because we had shared intimate details with each other and I did not want to feel guilty for the rest of my life for not standing up for the girl who trusted me and loved me. Lately, I came to know that my wife was in affair with one guy, before she met me, who was muslim and they got intimate on one occasion(didn't have sex) and parted their ways later on owing to the fact that they cannot have future together. They were together for around six months and used to sex chat on occasions and boy used to force her to have sex but she kept on denying all though the period(I read all their chats).Later on, around six months after this incident, one of her office colleague fooled her again in pretext of marrying her and had sex with her on one occasion and left her. She got heartbroken and left the company and moved on her life. I met her around one year after all of this and since then she has been faithful to me by all means.

    But what I feel bad is I married her just because she shared some intimate details of her with me and I felt guilty for getting her to this extent(assuming she is very innocent) and now it has turned out that she was not that innocent after all. Although she loves me a lot and has been very faithful since the day we have met but still I am confused about the future of our relation.

    Please guide me through these tough times and a sincere advice would mean a lot to me.

    Thank you.

  2. #2
    SB Guru Major rv102938's Avatar
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    You are talking about two different things here - first, you married her not because you love her but because you shared some secret? WTF, man...whats done is done. Now stop worrying and move on.

    Second, your wife did not share all details. But was there an understanding that she was expected to share all intimate past details? If not, then what are you crying about. If your wife has been faithful to you since marriage, then I suggest that you move on and do not bring this topic again. If you confront her now, you maybe stirring up an otherwise healthy relationship.
    Ek din sher banke jeene se behtar hai do din sher banke jiyo...

  3. #3
    ♥ fєmmє fαtαlє ♥ Major Sweet Mimi's Avatar
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    My dear i respect the way you felt responsible and married her. But you took that decision. Now you are simply regreting it.

    Looks like u forced urself to tale that decision of getting married to her. Well if you gave her space in ur life then dont overthink. This is what is causing you to feel this way. You are simply overthinking. When you get into relationship its time to forget the past.

    As far as she is now sincere the past shouldnt matter. Appreciate her love snd sincerity. If you will hold on past you will ruin ur life and her life. Things happrn in everyone lfe.


    There is no guarantee that you marry someone else and she wont have a past. She confide in you and you all about what happen. Trust her if she is loyal.

  4. #4
    Dactar :) Lieutenant-Colonel Neha1's Avatar
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    Divorce her and find a woman who don't have a past. Incase someday you find your new wife's past then divorce her too.
    Life is so simple , isn't it?
    You told your wife is faithful to you after marriage , but who cares ! It's the past that should be clean no matter if she dumps you after marriage.
    Anything that costs you your peace is too expensive

  5. #5
    SB Guru Major rv102938's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neha1 View Post
    Divorce her and find a woman who don't have a past. Incase someday you find your new wife's past then divorce her too.
    aap to bade jaldi gussa ho gaye....lambi lambi saans lijiye...
    Ek din sher banke jeene se behtar hai do din sher banke jiyo...

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    Dactar :) Lieutenant-Colonel Neha1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rv102938 View Post
    aap to bade jaldi gussa ho gaye....lambi lambi saans lijiye...
    Gussa hone wali baat he kr rha ye aadmi. Khud likh rha "I met her around one year after all of this and since then she has been faithful to me by all means," .... Ab aur Kya chahiye ise ?
    Anything that costs you your peace is too expensive

  7. #7
    SB Guru Major rv102938's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neha1 View Post
    Gussa hone wali baat he kr rha ye aadmi. Khud likh rha "I met her around one year after all of this and since then she has been faithful to me by all means," .... Ab aur Kya chahiye ise ?
    use ye bhi chahiye...use wo bhi chahiye...use sab chahiye....jo mil raha hai wo nahi chahiye...
    Ek din sher banke jeene se behtar hai do din sher banke jiyo...

  8. #8
    « rahmaniac » Lieutenant-Colonel ariesgirl's Avatar
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    Now that you have married her and know that she is faithful to you, nothing else should matter. Don't tell me that LOVE was never even the slightest reason why you married her. You did love her too apart from whatever intimate things you shared. And that too was a reason why you married her.she loves you and is honest with you. What else do you need?
    Even if you feel enraged with all these and leave your wife, nobody can assure you that the next woman who would come into your life will be faithful. Be happy with what you have and cherish your honest partner.
    Give people roses while they can still smell them. . .

  9. #9
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    past is past
    start new life with her

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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    Dear Preeto mam,
    I am a 30 years old male(hindu) married for 1.5 years. I got married to my wife because we had shared intimate details with each other and I did not want to feel guilty for the rest of my life for not standing up for the girl who trusted me and loved me. Lately, I came to know that my wife was in affair with one guy, before she met me, who was muslim and they got intimate on one occasion(didn't have sex) and parted their ways later on owing to the fact that they cannot have future together. They were together for around six months and used to sex chat on occasions and boy used to force her to have sex but she kept on denying all though the period(I read all their chats).Later on, around six months after this incident, one of her office colleague fooled her again in pretext of marrying her and had sex with her on one occasion and left her. She got heartbroken and left the company and moved on her life. I met her around one year after all of this and since then she has been faithful to me by all means.

    But what I feel bad is I married her just because she shared some intimate details of her with me and I felt guilty for getting her to this extent(assuming she is very innocent) and now it has turned out that she was not that innocent after all. Although she loves me a lot and has been very faithful since the day we have met but still I am confused about the future of our relation.

    Please guide me through these tough times and a sincere advice would mean a lot to me.

    Thank you.
    Hypocrisy at its best. All your queries are due to your male ego and foolishness. Firstly just to impress the girl, you told her to open and nothing will happen and broad mindedness. Then when you knew the truth, you dont have guts to digest it. No one can help you brother.

  11. #11
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    Dude, everything is alright in your relationship. Its just that you have a bit too much time for overthinking. Get busy, get a life. Khali dimaag shaitaan ka ghar.

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