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Thread: ★ Cricket - I bet u dont know these facts of cricket..

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    SB Wizard Captain krish.mukh's Avatar
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    Talking ★ Cricket - I bet u dont know these facts of cricket..



    Pic :- Australia's Adam Gilchrist hits a century
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    Modes of Dismissal in Cricket

    Run out

    A batsman may be in for such an abominably tedious length of time that he runs out of breath and therefore collapses. He is then required to walk after being resucitated.

    The only player to be exempt from this rule is Inzamam Ul-Haq of Pakistan, who the ICC believe is "completely incapable of running between the wicket." In 2003, the PCB proposed that a gnat would run between the wickets for him, and this ruling was agreed by the ICC 6 months later.

    Bowled

    This occurs when a sadistic delivery from an ultra-fast bowler takes the hair off the batsman. Batsmen need to duck in this situation to avoid being out!!

    LBW

    Although no cricket analyst has ever worked out what this stands for, the most frequent guess was that it "sounds like a band of some sort." Consequently LBW is the official term given for dismissing a batsman who feels driven to use his bat as a crude air guitar (though a few runs can sometimes be salvaged with a neat performance of 'Smoke on the Water').

    Stumped

    See the USA cricket team. This rule was first used in 1993 when Shane Warne bowled a mars bar to Mike Gatting, short of a length. The advancing Gatting missed the ball that was bowled after causing him to be stumped by the Wicket Keeper. That delivery is still regarded as the "ball/mars bar of the century."

    Caught

    The batsman is caught performing some socially unacceptable act, and must leave the field in embarrassment. In view of this rule, New Zealand has passed a law making the use of the word "blimey" a strict social taboo, punishable by burning in some provinces. The rules in cricket are so strict that Ian Botham, legendary all-rounder, was caught on camera picking a bogey and swallowing it whole. He had to walk.

    Hit wicket

    When a batsman is unceremoniously hit in his middle stump while trying to play a stroke causing him to fall to the ground in extreme pain, he is thus forced to walk, waddle or crawl off the ground. Inzamam-ul-Hack was the first batsman to be dismissed in such greed-induced circumstances, trying to grab the bag of crisps in Chris Read's pocket at Old Trafford.
    Last edited by krish.mukh; 11-05-2008 at 09:11 PM.

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    SB Wizard Captain krish.mukh's Avatar
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    Positions of Cricket
    While playing Cricket, 97% of your time is spent not actually playing Cricket. Thus, officials have been required to define hundreds of "fielding positions" in order to trick players into spending their weekend standing in the middle of a large grassy area. Most fielders tend to run forward several feet every time the ball is bowled; although seemingly pointless, this action is believed to prevent deep vein thrombosis: a common complaint among cricketers.

    The batsman

    The person with bat is and who is standing facing the umpire is known to be the batsman usually. Even women who bats is called to be batsman rather than batswoman. The batsman usually uses the bat for digging the pitch, pasting chewing gums, scattering jellybeans, fixing the stumps, hitting people, scaring poms, measuring ruler, scratching backs, as a support for standing and occasionally to hit the ball.

    The runner

    This runner is always a good friend and time passing for the umpire. It is often seen that the runners like to spend more time with the umpires. The runner also has a bat but uses only as the walking stick, or for holding like a guitar.mabey you can also show one of the bowling mechanaics one day

    Wicket Keeper

    Often also known as the keeper of the wicket, this is a very important position, especially during Test Matches which often last five days, occasionally with a result. At "Stumps" each day the umpires give the wicket to the wicket keeper to guard, at dawn the next day the wicket keeper must approach the pavillion from where the umpires will shout "Halt, Who goes There" to which the wicket keeper replies "The Keeper of the wicket", "Who'se wicket" respond the umires; "The Queens wicket", comes the reply. At this point the umpires allow the wicket keeper to place the wicket back on to the pitch and play starts for lunch.

    Umpire

    The umpire, in an officially hired fat old man to stand behind the three white sticks througout the entire match and carry stuff like murray mints, handkerchiefs, caps, pull-overs etc for the bowler and sometimes for the batsman. In cases where the bowlers are too demanding or if the batsman doesn't trust an umpire's honesty, another umpire is placed perpendicular to the batsman (also known as the square leg-umpire on account of his often mis-shapen left leg). Even then things can get really worse when a T.V. umpire is asked to stop watching Coronation Street and give a decision.

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    SB Wizard Captain krish.mukh's Avatar
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    Fine leg

    The Fine Leg Position

    Any fielding position where the fielder may be wearing shorts instead of pyjamas to show off his or her freshly waxed legs.


    Gully

    Streets in Indian slums are called "gullies", and are where many kids learn to play cricket. This fielding position is called Gully to make the Indians feel at home while fielding.

    Doggie

    Nothing to do with cricket, but a fine position none the less.

    Fourth man

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    SB Wizard Captain krish.mukh's Avatar
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    the ranked #1 Batsman




    Types of Bowling
    Bowlers can bowl a variety of different balls which include soccer balls, peanuts and small rodents, particularly hampsters. Different ways of spinning the ball can be applied, politicians are experts of this craft. Anyone who can't spin the ball or bowl fast, or acurately are normally refered to as batsmen, or a "Pom Bowler".


    Fast Bowling

    A ball deemed to cause rifts in th space/time continuum and completely defy the laws of physics is a fast bowl. The most famous of which is where Glenn McGrath caused the batsman, Stephen Hawking, to be thrown into a talking, toothbrushing wheel chair and to be paralysed. This also caused Stephen Hawking's facination with physics, and has been a nerd ever since.

    Medium Pace

    Warney's texting speed.

    Spin

    This intricate type of bowling is so complex and stupidly hard that only one has ever managed to master it. It involves the bowler spinning around so fast that their hair starts to fall out before stumbling up to the crease and bowling. The negative side affect is being forced to appear in countless hair regrowth adverts and brain damage. Muttiah Muralitharan of Sri Lanka has mastered the art of spinning around and is called the little master or GOD of spinning which made Shamed Warne to get so pissed off.

    Off Spin

    Spin bowling when it's past its best before date. The GOD of off spin is Muttiah Muralitharan aka Murali.

    Leg Spin

    Not only the opposite of Off Spin, but also the ability to propel the leg of a mammal (land-based or other) at the batsman. A fat Australian has claimed to bowl Leg Spin, but he only bowled a hard red leather sphere while being fat. The only ever documented case off Leg Spin is "Gogga" Adams, he achieved this awesome feat only once before leaving the field of play with a gaping wound above the knee. Since that day "Gogga" Adams bowls a hard red leather sphere with only one leg while being slightly less fat.

    Aussie Shane "Horney" Warne is a famous a Leg Spin bowler as he loved the spin the whores over.

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    SB Wizard Captain krish.mukh's Avatar
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    More usless info after replies

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    Maverick Colonel Isotope A10's Avatar
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    Funny thread !!
    I am Freakin' Insecure Neurotically Emotional.


    I am FINE.

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    SB MahaGuru Colonel
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    tfs yar post more!!!

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    Gully

    Streets in Indian slums are called "gullies", and are where many kids learn to play cricket. This fielding position is called Gully to make the Indians feel at home while fielding.

    Doggie

    Nothing to do with cricket, but a fine position none the less.
    I Don't Exactly Hate you!
    However, if you were on fire, and I had water,
    I'd drink it!


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    SB Wizard Captain krish.mukh's Avatar
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    pic :- George Bush hits the ball for a giant six. Because of the speed of the ball, it destroyed everything in between Afghanistan and Pakistan in a Nuclear attack as it landed in Kazakhstan.

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    nice one dude


    rep added .............

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    SB Wizard Captain krish.mukh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by roseboy11 View Post
    nice one dude


    rep added .............
    thanks repped u back

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    SB Wizard Captain krish.mukh's Avatar
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    More info after i finish uploadin pix

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    SB Guru Lieutenant-Colonel thegr8rocky's Avatar
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    Funny Thread Buddy..............

    Repz ++

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    ●๋•нαя ∂нα∂кαη υѕкє ℓιソє● Field Marshal kaps58's Avatar
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    repp Added Bro...

    Amazingly Funny Work..!!!!!!
    God is Really Creative....I Mean... Just Luk @ Me ...!!!

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    HALLA BOL Field Marshal amitsush's Avatar
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    funny thread bro, thanx for sharing
    I WILL LOOK FOR U
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